Individuals are often looking for healthier ways to express their emotions.
For Example: Anger
That said, it’s not as simple as becoming “more calm” or “less explosive”.
The first step in transformation and lasting change is looking below the surface.
The Kübler-Ross Model provides insight:
The goal is to discover if angry thoughts, actions, or emotions are serving a purpose.
Is anger helping or hurting?
Why Anger?
Perhaps anger allows someone to speak up, say no, set a boundary, or bond with friends.
And if this is the case, the goal of coaching is to help clients replace confrontations (for example) with more effective communication patterns.
PSYCHOLOGY HOMEWORK
Anger → Awareness
First: Set aside time to journal thoughts and emotions about “hot topics”. This allows for a cooling off period and a chance for self reflection and integration.
Second: Plan a mutually beneficial time to discuss anger triggers and solutions with friends and family.
This 2-step communication technique results in safe, open, and engaging conversations that move both relationships and actions forward. Win Win!
Reflection Questions
- What Purpose Does Anger Serve in Your Life? Gains versus Losses?
- Does It Strengthen or Deplete You?
- Does Anger Move You Further Away from Your Dreams or Closer to Your Dreams?
- What In Your Life Needs To Change?
- Do You Need More Effective Ways of Coping with Frustration and/or Loss?
Once you understand the underlying purpose anger serves in your life, you’re ready for the next stage in the change process:
Transition and Transformation
Psychology Resources
- New Conceptualizations of Anger: https://www.apa.org/monitor/mar03/advances
- How Anger Affects the Body: https://www.psychologytoday.com/za/blog/the-mind-body-connection/202007/what-causes-anger-and-how-it-affects-the-body
- Healthy Anger Release Techniques: https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-release-anger
- Assessing Motivation To Change: https://drandreadinardo.com/2018/08/18/why-change-now