1. Encourage people by sharing your own stories of difficulty and overcoming.
This helps others understand that no one begins their success journey at the top of the mountain. And that each failure is an opportunity to rise up. Again and again.
2. Hold a safe space for loved ones to ‘not be ok’ when overwhelmed.
Rushing anyone through difficult emotions will prolong feelings of fear, threat, and danger.
My favourite part of this photo is the story behind it.
When the magazine was arranging the photo shoot, they asked where my favourite place to recharge was in Windsor (Ontario, Canada). I shared that it was a top of Blue Heron Hill overlooking Lake Heron and Lake St. Clair. So you can just imagine the photographer hiking his equipment up the hill, with me tagging along in my wedge high sandals!
But the reward was worth it..
All you can see is blue for days. My favourite colour and place. 💙🍃
I hope this interview encourages you to keep shooting for the stars and believing in your dreams.
Ultimately reminding you that the power within you will always be greater than the challenges around you.
In my TEDx Talk I discuss how to THRIVE under pressure using 3 stress resilience tools: challenge, control and commitment.
The purpose of this talk and my blog is to help students develop positive coping techniques in fun, interactive, and uplifting ways.
By first focusing on what is right, before examining what is wrong, students can be transformed by their challenges and adversities.
If you like, please share this TEDx video with friends and family on social media. The wider its reach, the more people I can help thrive under pressure!
What you will find is the more consistently you pay attention to your own drives and desires, the better you will understand the emotions and motivations of others.
Simple self-awareness exercise.
In the video below, I share the simple exercise I use to enhance self-awareness in myself and others. Can you guess the EQ questions I ask students?
Your Turn:
How would you describe yourself in one word?
To hear my “one word” — check out the 1 min video above. 📌🎥
With time, I have come to realize that failure has always been my greatest teacher. Each failure pointed me in a better direction. Helped me to develop strength and authenticity. Ultimately unveiling who I was and what I was destined to become.
The failing grade I received on my first exam in graduate school taught me how to ask for support when I needed it most. No matter how shameful I felt or embarrassed I was.
The end of a long-term relationship taught me how to value my time alone and make tough decisions for myself. No matter how weak I felt or lonesome I was.
The lay off from a job I loved taught me how to let go, look forward, and trust in something so much bigger than myself. No matter how scared I was or irrelevant I felt.
What determines our reaction to failure?
Learning from failure is the ultimate goal. That said, not everyone responds to failure in the same way, at the same time.
Our reaction to failure is determined by several factors, including:
Ask someone how they feel about failure in the midst of it; life as they know it is over. Ask someone how they feel about failure one year later; life as they know it has been transformed.
The key to supporting someone experiencing failure is not to rush them through the healing process. Yes, in the long run, the gifts of failure outweigh the costs. But we must be sensitive to how dark it feels in the eye of the storm. Only then can move towards the light.
Is it possible to see failure in a positive light?
Under the right conditions, failure strengthens us, adds to our self-knowledge, and enhances the quality of our lives.
If it weren’t for failure, I would not have met my husband John.
If it weren’t for failure, I would not be a psychology professor.
If it weren’t for failure, I would not have written three textbooks.
If it weren’t for failure, I would not be the person I am today.
Signs pointing us in the direction of our dreams are everywhere.
Everywhere!
But we have to look UP to see it.
OPEN our minds to BELIEVE it.
Daily Visualization Exercise
The next time you see a 30 km, 40 km, or even 100 km sign — take it as an opportunity to visualize where (and who) you want to be at that age.
Additionally, use each “sign” as instant reflection time for contemplating: 1) what you need to do more of and 2) what you need to let go of to get there.
