3 Ways to Bounce Forward

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Coping Strategies, Health Psychology, Mental Health Education, motivation, Personal Growth, Positive Psychology, Resilience, resources, Strengths, Thriving, Video

Plan A is a Fantasy. Plan B is Reality.

The idea we have for our life rarely, if ever, matches up with the life we end up with.

Life is not a straight line. 

Which is often a blessing in disguise.

Yet something we seldom realize in the thick of life.

How do we move on from what was to what will be?

How do we bridge the gap between expectations and reality?

3 Ways to Bounce Forward

1. Normalize Failure and Defeat

No one begins their journey at the top of the mountain. We all have to earn our way up.

A universal human experience of try, fail, learn, repeat.

Ultimately understanding that failure is not bad, it is an opportunity to build character and strength.

In this video I describe all the failures that helped me discover who I was and what I was destined to become. Failure introduced me to myself!

Some paths cannot be discovered without getting lost.

Erol Ozan

2. Adopt a Growth Mindset

Stay open to everything!

Openness shifts our mindset from fixed to growth.

Mantras and Affirmations

Resilience mantras help tremendously.

Re-imagine stressful moments as growth moments. Opportunities moving you one step closer to your dreams.

In this video I share my self-talk in the eye of the storm. Chanting “I am expanding” as the rain falls.

Stop Shrinking Yourself to Places You’ve Outgrown

Furaha Joyce

3. Celebrate All You Have Overcome

In this video I share the hard lessons I learned early on as a young psychologist experiencing compassion fatigue.

And how it laid the foundation for my work in resilience and positive psychology.

When we learn how to become resilient, we learn how to embrace the broad spectrum of the human experience.

Jaeda DeWalt

Trust Your Journey

Love is a Language – What’s Yours?

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Communication, Emotional Awareness, Happiness, health, Hope, Inspiration, motivation, Personal Growth, Psychology Class, Reflection Question, Social Psychology, Teaching

How do you express your love?

Take Quiz

  1. The 5 Love Languages Quiz for Singles: Click Here
  2. The 5 Love Languages Quiz for Couples: Click Here
  3. Paper Version of Quiz — Tap on Photo Below

Love and Social Psychology

One of the reasons I love teaching psychology is that it gives me the opportunity to share why we do what we do. Including in romance!

The more we understand ourselves, the more compassionate we will be about ourselves and others.

Self Awareness and Social Awareness go hand in hand.

So given today is Valentine’s Day, I thought it would be a good time to resurrect a 2019 social psychology lecture on the 5 love languages.

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In this particular psychology class, we talked about: 1) what we value in a relationship, 2) our preferred love language, and 3) possible reasons for romantic successes and failures.

Discussed more fully in the two videos below.

The Theories of Love (Part 1)

In the first video I discuss the psychological theories and related life experiences that lay the foundation for a social psychology class on love and attraction (Chapter 14 in my psychology textbook).

The Reality of Love (Part 2)

In the second video I reflect upon the lessons learned in psychology class and how to apply these love lessons in real life.

Topics covered on video and in class:

  1. While dating, be on the lookout for concrete factual evidence of what is important to you. Both in person and online.
  2. For example, how does “love for family” show up in your potential partner’s actions.
  3. Also, if your relationship values include loyalty, spending time outdoors, and making mental health a priority. Is this something the person you are dating also values and lives by?
  4. It is also important to look beyond the surface and pay attention to nonverbal cues, communication, and behaviour.
  5. Do their words match their behaviour? For example, your date claims to be a great listener while spending the entire night checking their phone.

When people show you who they are, believe them.

Maya Angelou
FiveLoveLanguages-Web

Self-Reflection Questions

1. What do you value most in a potential partner?

For example : trustworthiness – kindness – compassion – intelligence – humour – physical attractiveness – attentiveness

2. How do your values match up with your 5 love languages?

For example: Love Notes – Surprise Gifts – Listening – Helping – Quality Time – Cuddling

Love Quiz → Click Here
Love Video 1 → Click Here
Love Video 2 → Click Here

Meaningful Online Connections

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Communication, Emotional Intelligence, Psychology Class, Purpose and Meaning, Social Psychology, Video42 Comments

5 Ways to Create Meaningful Connections in a Virtual World

This list was initially created for students embarking on a new career during covid-19. It also includes EQ techniques helpful for everyone.

  1. Connect with intention.
    • Before engaging with someone online, take a step back and ask why you are doing so.
    • What is the purpose of the interaction?
    • What are you hoping to gain or give?
  2. Make it all about them.
    • Listening is an essential ingredient in effective communication, online interactions included.
    • Listening also provides a much needed break from monotonous internal dialogue.
    • In a virtual world, “listening” often takes place through reading and staying open to another person’s perspective. No matter how different.
    • From “Me to We”
  3. Do the people research.
    • The first thing I do before I engage with someone online is read their page – literally!
    • I read their “About Me” biography. Plus their comments and interactions on social media, blog posts, and articles. And if available, I listen to their interviews and watch accompanying videos.
    • I love learning about the people I interact with. Especially their strengths.
  4. Do the company research.
    • This is where I get curious about what makes a company tick!
    • The people, the history, the economics, the geography, the philosophy.
    • The company’s motto and theme song (check out their facebook page).
    • Pick up the phone and talk to the receptionist and administrative assistants — the pulse of the organization. And if possible, engage with front line workers and management.
    • This is also the time to assess if the company’s core values match up with your own.
    • Is it a good fit?
  5. Create a need for your services.
    • What makes YOU .. YOU?!
    • What makes you unique, different, quirky, goofy, all kinds of wonderful?
    • This is the part of the online interaction process where your personality wraps around your talents, education, and abilities.
    • For example: when I was a kid, my Dad always said: “Andrea, you better get a job where you get paid to talk” because.. I couldn’t stop talking! (you should have seen my grade 8 report card)
    • This is why I come alive in the classroom but would fade away in a research lab.
    • What parts of your personality make your skill set stand out?

Your Turn: How Do You Create Meaningful Connections in a Virtual World?

Watch 3 min Video of Post: Click Here

What advice would you give your younger self?

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Hope, leadership, Optimism, Peace, Reflection Question, Training and Development37 Comments

Live Zoom Conference

At a recent leadership conference, student leaders from St. Clair College’s Student Representative Council SRC had the opportunity to ask questions live during the final portion of the virtual training event.

Ask Dr. D

The student leaders raised the reflection bar high during this discussion period.

One Question Stood Out The Most

Specifically:

What Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self?

In the video below, I share my answer.

“It All Works Out“

Even during COVID-19.

For the pandemic has not changed my optimistic perspective on life and learning.

If anything, COVID-19 has underscored my belief in posttraumatic growth and resilience.

For everybody.

Growth is the only evidence of life.

John Henry Newman
Watch 4 min Video of Post: Click Here

2020 Life Lessons: Be Strong Enough To Be Gentle

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn acceptance, Communication, Emotional Awareness, Emotional Intelligence, kindness, Mindfulness, Peace, Personal Growth, psychology, Reflection Question65 Comments

Lockdowns have us spending a lot of extra time with the ones we love.

Especially during the holidays.

And if you’re anything like our household, it requires a whole new level of relationship skills.

A deeper level of empathy and compassion for the pressures of the people we are living with.

Helpful Tips: Psychology Today

What worked before, doesn’t necessarily work now.

And if it does, it takes more patience, more compassion, more love.

For ourselves and others.

Emotionally Intelligent COVID Conversations

How does this show up in our home?

Emotional Intelligence: Resources

One approach that has helped tremendously is how I ask to have my needs met.

Not what I say but how I say it.

Same message.

Different Approach.

A new level of gentleness.

Power versus Force

Kindness versus Conviction

The beauty of this 2020 life lesson is that when I am strong enough to be gentle: I am heard.

What life lessons has 2020 taught you?

Watch 2 min Video of Post: Click Here

Emotional CPR: Catch Triggers Before They Escalate

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Balance, Coping Strategies, Health Psychology, Mental Health, Mental Health Education, Mindfulness, Positive Psychology, Resilience, Stress Management, Training and Development26 Comments

Emotional Health

I recently did a virtual keynote at the Healthy Workplace Awards 2020 Ceremony.

News Release: CTV News

Given all we are collectively going through, I thought the notes and video from the presentation would be helpful to everyone.

Especially as we wrap up 2020. A year where we collectively experienced one of the most monumental global events in history.

A time of rapid change, adaptation, and transformation.

Virtual Keynote Talk

During the 14 minute virtual keynote, I shared a Framework for Sustainable Resilience and Mental Health called Catch Pause Repair (CPR):

CPR includes 3 steps:

1. Catch

Catch yourself before a stress response escalates by becoming more aware of what triggers you. 

What Are Your Stress Triggers? 
Self Test Here

2. Pause

Pause and take a 60 second time out when you feel the physical sensations of stress begin to escalate. 

One Minute Meditation
Relax Here

3. Repair

Repair the root source of the heightened stress response which is often physiological in nature. Possible unmet needs include: sleep, food, fresh air, exercise.

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs 
Overview Here

CPR in Your Life

  1. How do you catch triggers before they escalate?
  2. How often do you pause throughout the day?
  3. Which of Maslow’s five needs require repair?
Watch CPR Presentation: Click Here

Shine your light

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn community, Hope, Love, Mindfulness, Peace50 Comments

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I used to think of life purpose as some great big grand scheme for life, something we spend our whole life chasing after. Daunting for sure. At times overwhelming.

Then one day I realized that life purpose was a series of small, fleeting events, rather than one great big span of life. Bite size in fact.

It’s the one thing we love doing, time and time again. Over and over. Day by day. It’s the one thing we love sharing. Moment to moment. Breath by breath.

RELATED POST:
Don't confuse purpose with occupation

What makes your heart sing?

For me it’s making the person right in front of me (no matter who they are) feel like the most important person in the world.

Engaging fully, completely, in every conversation I have.

No matter how long. No matter how short.

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REFLECTION QUESTION:
What makes you come alive?

I love making someone’s day brighter.

  • Whether it be lifting the spirits of my psychology students.
  • Encouraging a barista at Starbucks.
  • Smiling at runners on the trail.
  • Leaving my sister an uplifting voicemail.
  • Opening the door for someone at the grocery store.
  • Listening intently to my husband at the end of a long day.

Mission for this Moment

My hope for today is to make you feel like the centre of my universe. One smile at a time. One conversation at time. If only for a moment. Sometimes for a lifetime.

Because you matter.

More than you’ll ever know.

Simple Soulful Practice

How I Light Up My Day

Sometimes we need a quick, fun, and easy way to elevate our mood. Suggestion: Angel Cards A simple, soulful practice that takes a (bite sized) moment. Now my friends ask me to bring angel cards to all our coffee talks. Even if we’re sitting 8 feet apart! These light-hearted cards guarantee a shift UP in conversation. From the mundane to the magical.

What lights your way today?

New Virtual Experiences During COVID-19

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn community, Coping Strategies, Health Psychology, Mental Health Education, Optimism, Personal Growth, Resilience, technology, Thriving, Training and Development, Video42 Comments

Staying Hopeful

I wanted to share how I have been keeping hope alive in my heart and soul during COVID-19.

Specifically, by expanding my reach with new virtual experiences.

Beginning in the spring with my first “live” recorded internet event with Sam Piercell, a fitness entrepreneur, from Windsor, Ontario.

F45 "Live" Event: 
Community Resilience with Dr. Andrea Dinardo

Resilience Habits & Routines

Community members asked stress, wellness, and psychology questions in real time.

Throughout the resilience seminar, I also shared daily habits and thought patterns keeping me healthy during the pandemic.

Optimism, hope, and humour are key factors in health, happiness, and resilience.

Optimism Bootcamp The Drive Magazine

Sharing Our COVID Experiences

Since then, I have been interviewed virtually by:

  1. Dr. Katherin Garland on Mental Health Matters (watch: video interview).
  2. Candace Sampson on What She Said Radio (watch: video interview).

We discussed situational and pandemic anxiety, health and positive psychology, time and energy management, social media boundaries, resilience, and thriving under pressure.

2020 “Stretch” Goals

  • GOAL: Stay Connected to each other in new and novel ways.
  • HOW: Interactive LIVE “Q & A” conversations in real time.
  • MEDIUM: ZOOM, INSTAGRAM, FACEBOOK, YOUTUBE.

Adapting to the New Normal

In the past, online interactions were “an extra” to everyday conversation.

Now “the virtual life” is a necessity for both our personal and professional lives.

An important and crucial way to stay connected to both our dreams and each other.

2020 is the World’s Classroom

PSYCHOLOGY TEACHING ONLINE - BEHIND THE SCENES:
1. What It's Like to Be a Professor During Global Pandemic
2. "Live" Online Psychology Class

Hope and Change

“Adapt or Die” may sound harsh.

But adaptation is truly what’s being asked of us in every area of our lives right now.

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So I figure I might as well jump right in!

Because I would rather ride the wave, than have the wave ride me. 🌊

What’s Next? 

VIRTUAL KEYNOTE: Healthy Workplace Awards

Anxiety Relief Technique

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Emotional Awareness, Mental Health Education, psychology, Self Reflection, Video

FEAR is an illusion

5 Why’s Technique

The 5 Why’s is a simple and effective technique for understanding the source of our fears and cognitive distortions (irrational beliefs) one why at a time.

Exploring the Unconscious Mind

An analytic (below the surface) strategy originating in the psychoanalytic theories of Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung.

What’s Under the Fear?

Freud’s Iceberg Analogy : Click Here

Brief Instructions

  1. Write down on a sheet of paper something you beat yourself up for over and over again. (Related Post: Why Are We So Hard on Ourselves)
  2. State the anxiety provoking situation out loud.
  3. For example:
    • Why is it so overwhelming for me to spend time with ________ ?
    • Why do I repeatedly agree to do ___________ when I know it makes me uncomfortable?
  4. Ask Yourself Why in response to your question Five Times.
  5. Watch the psychology video below for a “live” example of this technique.

5 Why’s Technique on YouTube:

The goal is to discover the root source of what causes fear in a particular time, place, or situation.

With the ultimate intention of enhancing inner peace and understanding.

By differentiating what’s real from what’s not.

To Learn More

Watch my in-depth interview on situational anxiety with Dr. Katherin Garland: https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=N7ttX6h_D8o

Enjoy Every Moment

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Mindfulness, nature, Peace, Relaxation, Stress Relief and Release, Video33 Comments

Never let the things you want make you forget the things you already have.

Nothing Lasts Forever.

Good or Bad.

Enjoy Every Moment.

Embrace it.

Be it.

See it.

Everything you appreciate is you reflecting back.

Homework for Today

Look Around You.

Notice Things Like You Are Seeing Them for the Very First Time.
Watch Video Of Post: Click Here

Failure as Feedback

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn courage, Inspiration, Personal Growth, Resilience, Self Reflection, Strengths, Stress Hardiness, Student Motivation, Student Success, The Drive Magazine, Thriving, Video122 Comments

“Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit.“

With time, I have come to realize that failure has always been my greatest teacher. Each failure pointed me in a better direction and helped me to develop strength and authenticity, ultimately unveiling who I was and what I was destined to become

F. A. I. L. = First Attempt In Learning

• The failing grade I received on my first exam in graduate school taught me how to ask for support when I needed it most, no matter how shameful I felt or embarrassed I was.

• The end of a long-term relationship taught me how to value my time alone and make tough decisions for myself, no matter how weak I felt or lonesome I was.

• The layoff from a job I loved taught me how to let go, look forward, and trust in something so much bigger than myself, no matter how scared I was or irrelevant I felt.

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”

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Is it possible to see failure in a positive light?

Under the right conditions, failure strengthens us, adds to our self-knowledge, and enhances the quality of our lives

• If it weren’t for failure, I would not have met my husband John.

• If it weren’t for failure, I would not be a psychology professor.

• If it weren’t for failure, I would not have written three textbooks.

• If it weren’t for failure, I would not be the person I am today.

“Failure is the opportunity to begin again.”

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Read My Article in The Drive Magazine: https://thedrivemagazine.com/posts/failure-as-feedback

 Your Turn:

What has failure taught you?

Watch Video of Post: Click Here

Does Your Self-Talk Energize You or Drain You?

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Inspiration, Mantra, Peace, Positive Psychology, Thriving, Video

How we talk to ourselves matters.

Especially at the start of a brand new day.

Our thoughts are the lyrics to our daily soundtrack after all.

A topic I talk about with love and laughter in this video workshop:

Psychology Homework:

The One Day at a Time Approach

Step One: Awareness

Begin by WAKING UP to your inner dialogue tomorrow morning.

Notice the first thing you think of when you look in the mirror.

Is it loving? Is it kind?

Step Two: Mirror Affirmations

Write an encouraging quote for yourself on your bathroom mirror.

At a loss for words?

Pick any one of the quotes you’ve shared with the world on social media this past year and post it for yourself on your bathroom mirror.

It only takes one thought, one word, one smile, one song, to change a life.

Begin with your own.

You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.

Watch Video: Click Here

3 Energy Management Techniques

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Health Psychology, Interview, Mental Health Education, Optimal Performance, Positive Psychology, Self-Care, Time and Energy Management, Video53 Comments

What we give energy to impacts everything.

Thoughts. Emotions. Actions. People.

Some drain. Others invigorate.

Awareness is the first step to enhancing vitality.

The goal is to identify the source of energy leaks and peaks.

Where to start?

My recent interview on FM 105.9 The Region was designed to help people become more conscious of what depletes their energy and what lifts them up.

Rather than focusing on time, which is finite, I suggested to radio host Candace Sampson that we turn our attention to energy management, which in turn expands the amount of time we have.

Because when we feel energized, we can do twice as much in half the time.

Watch Interview:

What She Said Talk on FM 105.9 The Region

3 Energy Tips Shared:

Tip #1: Debits and Credits
(Energy Audit)
Daily Tracking System of Who and What Depletes You
Tip #2: Put a Time Limit on Negativity
(Stove Timer)
Conscious awareness of how much time with friends and family is spent on complaining (draining) versus solutions (energizing).
Tip #3: Energy is Everywhere
(Combat Boots Anchoring Exercise)
Energetic grounding rituals before interacting online.
*All 3 tips described in detail in both a) the August 20 energy video above and b) the extended September 1 podcast interview below.

Reflection Questions:

  1. How do you manage your energy throughout the day?
  2. Is energy something you consciously pay attention to?
  3. What is your energy level on a scale of 1-10 right now?
  4. What (who) drains you?
  5. What (who) energizes you?
Video of Blog Post: Click Here

Freedom is realizing you have a choice.

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Emotional Freedom, empowerment, Happiness, health, Mental Health, Reflection Question, Self Actualization, Stress Relief and Release, Video86 Comments

Freedom doesn’t come from holding on.

Freedom comes from letting go.

Again and again and again.

Too often we are hard on ourselves for having to release the same thought, emotion, person, or situation over and over again. 

When in fact this is how life goes.

Letting go and surrendering are an ongoing process. And as necessary for our mental health as eating is for our physical health.

We must eat three times a day. And sometimes we have to surrender (thirty) three times a day.

And that’s ok. That’s how life flows..

F R E E D O M

Reflection Question

If you only had ONE YEAR to live:

What would you STOP doing?

THE CHOICE IS YOURS

Video of Blog Post: Click Here

Situational Anxiety Interview

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Coping Strategies, Health Psychology, Interview, Mental Health, Mental Health Education, Personal Growth, Positive Psychology, Reflection Question, Video24 Comments

Mental Health Matters Interview

Situational Anxiety

Dr. Katherin Garland

Host of Mental Health Matters

This week, I speak with one of my dearest blogging friends, Dr. D!

We discuss all things anxiety. She explains the difference between anxiety disorder and situational anxiety.

Dr. Dinardo provides 3 strategies to help us cope with situational anxiety, especially because it may be heightened during the pandemic and times of racial unrest.

1. Video Format of Interview

Watch on YouTube.

2. Podcast Format of Interview

Available on SoundCloud and Apple Podcasts.

Reflection Questions

  1. What did you learn about situational versus clinical anxiety from our interview?
  2. Can you relate to the personal example of heightened situational anxiety shared by Dr. Garland? How so?
  3. Have you experienced increased situational anxiety since COVID-19? In what areas of your life?
  4. What techniques help you cope with unexpected stressors and challenges?
  5. Do you see failure as a positive or a negative? Why?
  6. How does fear, trepidation, and worry manifest physically in your body?
  7. What would you tell your younger self about stress and anxiety?
Watch Anxiety Video: Click Here

IS THIS NORMAL? Temporary Emotions vs Mental Illness

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Mental Health Education, Psychology Class, Teaching, Training and Development, Video38 Comments

The most common question people ask when they discover I’m a retired psychologist is – “Is This Normal?“

This question is a significant motivator for creating this psychology blog in the first place.

Because too often people suffer because of lack of understanding versus a diagnosable medical condition.

differential diagnosis  ·  the process of differentiating between two or more conditions which share similar signs or symptoms.

Case Study

Two people present with similar symptoms (e.g., rapid heart beat, excessive worrying, difficulty concentrating) with vastly different causes.

On closer inspection

One person’s symptoms is caused by lack of sleep, excessive caffeine consumption, and a recent breakup.

While the other person’s symptoms is caused by a mental illness, as diagnosed by a registered psychologist, using the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5).

One improves with time and lifestyle changes, while the other requires more intensive psychological intervention.

Education Empowers Everyone

This is why it’s my life mission to share psychology everywhere, all the time.

In the classroom. During podcasts. On YouTube. Radio. Television. Psychology articles, textbooks and blog posts. On the TEDx stage.  Instagram . In between sets at F45 workouts.. and at the local coffee shop.

Psychology is my favourite subject after all.

Psychology Goals

To make DAILY mental health education accessible, sustainable, and easily APPLICABLE.

To eradicate misconceptions about normal versus abnormal functioning.

To help students develop positive coping techniques in fun, interactive, and uplifting ways.

To reduce stigma about mental illness.

<p value="<amp-fit-text layout="fixed-height" min-font-size="6" max-font-size="72" height="80"><strong>To encourage people to <a rel="noreferrer noopener" href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y2TPwLTDASc&t=3s&quot; target="_blank">seek professional help and guidance</a> for mental health queries. </strong>To encourage people to seek professional help and guidance for mental health queries.

Instead of simply asking a friend’s opinion on a topic of utmost importance.

Video:

Therapy versus Talking to Friends: What’s the difference?

Especially when it comes to transitory states, emotions, and situations.

<p class="has-drop-cap" value="<amp-fit-text layout="fixed-height" min-font-size="6" max-font-size="72" height="80">Stress versus panic disorder. Stress versus panic disorder.

Sadness versus clinical depression.

Neatness versus obsessive compulsive disorder.

The topic of this week’s psychology video:

Video:

Is This Normal? Temporary Emotions versus Mental Illness

For example, distressing emotions often improve with rest, perspective, and time.

While mental illness requires more ongoing medical support and therapy to see improved functioning.

My hope is that mental health education becomes paramount in both the classroom and the doctor’s office.

An ongoing conversation about what’s healthy versus what’s not.

So that people don’t automatically assume they’re mentally ill simply because they’re having a bad day.

More Resources Coming Soon!

Mental Health Matters

Host Dr. Kathy Garland

SITUATIONAL ANXIETY with Dr. Dinardo

Live Interview

Airing July 31, 2020!

Stay Tuned for Dr. Garland’s Video & Podcast!

Anger is a sign that something needs to change.

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Change and Transformation, Emotional Awareness, Mental Health, Mindfulness, Personal Growth, Self Reflection, Video33 Comments

Anger Quote DrAndreaDinardo.com

Individuals are often looking for healthier ways to express their emotions.

For Example: Anger

That said, it’s not as simple as becoming “more calm” or “less explosive”.

The first step in transformation and lasting change is looking below the surface.

The Kübler-Ross Model provides insight:

5 Stages of Grief and Change

The goal is to discover if angry thoughts, actions, or emotions are serving a purpose.

Is anger helping or hurting?

How is anger serving you

Why Anger?

Perhaps anger allows someone to speak up, say no, set a boundary, or bond with friends.

And if this is the case, the goal of psychology coaching is to help clients replace confrontations (for example) with more effective communication patterns.

PSYCHOLOGY HOMEWORK

Anger → Awareness

First: Set aside time to journal thoughts and emotions about “hot topics”. This allows for a cooling off period and a chance for self reflection and integration.

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Second: Plan a mutually beneficial time to discuss anger triggers and solutions with friends and family.

This 2-step communication technique results in safe, open, and engaging conversations that move both relationships and actions forward. Win Win!

Reflection Questions

  1. What Purpose Does Anger Serve in Your Life? Gains versus Losses?
  2. Does It Strengthen or Deplete You?
  3. Does Anger Move You Further Away from Your Dreams or Closer to Your Dreams?
  4. What In Your Life Needs To Change?
  5. Do You Need More Effective Ways of Coping with Frustration and/or Loss?

Once you understand the underlying purpose anger serves in your life, you’re ready for the next stage in the change process:

Transition and Transformation

Change Quote DrAndreaDinardo.com.

Psychology Resources

  1. New Conceptualizations of Anger: https://www.apa.org/monitor/mar03/advances
  2. How Anger Affects the Body: https://www.psychologytoday.com/za/blog/the-mind-body-connection/202007/what-causes-anger-and-how-it-affects-the-body
  3. Healthy Anger Release Techniques: https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-release-anger
  4. Assessing Motivation To Change: https://drandreadinardo.com/2018/08/18/why-change-now

Your Dreams Have A Message For You

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn psychology, Psychology Class, Relaxation, Self Reflection47 Comments

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One of the first things I do every morning is analyze my dreams.

What about you?

Do you remember your dreams?

Do you interpret their meaning?

Have you ever dreamt the same dream repeatedly?

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In the video below I share the dream I had last night.

Dream Symbol: Water

A “dream theme” I have at least twice a week.

Dream Discussion Forum

If you’re curious about the psychology of dreams, leave a dream in the comments and I will interpret it for you.

Sweet Dreams! Dr. D 🛌 💭

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Learn More

  1. Online Dream Symbol Dictionary: What Do Your Dreams Mean?
  2. “Active Imagination“:  Jungian Recall Strategy
  3. Brain Processes that Allow You to Remember Dreams: Scientific American
  4. Mind Mapping Your Dreams:  Spatial and Visual Dream Exercise
  5. A to Z of Dream Interpretation: What Dreams Reveal About Our Lives, Loves, and Deepest Fears. (The Dream Book Pictured Above)
Watch Video of Post: Click Here

The Stars and The Scars

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Affirmation, Inspiration, Peace, Zen

Leonard Cohen Quote DrAndreaDinardo.com

And your darkness.

And all your shades of grey.

That’s what makes you complete.

All the parts of you.

Integrating.

Changing. Transforming.

Simply being.

Accepting.

This moment. Yourself.

Whatever the day may bring.

Ring the bells that still can ring. Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.

Leonard Cohen

Story behind the blog post

Yesterday someone asked me what my philosophy of psychology was. And the one word that kept coming to me over and over again was: Integration.

All the parts of ourselves. The scars and the stars. Just like coal and diamonds. Same element (carbon). Different manifestation.

Wholeness is the goal. Perfection is overrated.

Carl Jung Integration Wholeness DrAndreaDinardo.com

Helpful Psychology Resources

  1. Blog Post: The Shadow Effect
  2. Video Post: Healing Your Inner Critic
  3. Book: Bringing Your Shadow Out of the Dark
  4. Research: Self-Compassion Research Summarized
  5. Theory: Carl Jung’s Individuation and Wholeness Process

What Trauma Taught Me About Happiness

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn courage, Happiness, health, Hope, Mental Health Education, Personal Growth, Positive Psychology, Resilience, Video52 Comments
Dr. Andrea Dinardo Trauma

Is it possible to feel joy in the face of adversity?

Strength during the lowest of lows?

Creativity in the midst of destruction?

Peace in difficulty?

Vibrancy during cancer?

Happiness during COVID-19?

In the video below, I share some personal examples from my own upbringing on how my parents found strength and contentment during even the darkest of times.

Your Thoughts:

Can trauma and happiness coexist?

I’d love to hear your ideas, theories, and personal stories.

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Compassionate Listening

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn community, Emotional Awareness, empowerment, Hope, Mindfulness, Optimism, Peace, Social Psychology47 Comments

Even as a psychologist, I often don’t know what to say.

Especially now with so many people experiencing pain and trauma in escalating ways.

So rather than assume what someone needs, I have learned over the years to ask one simple question:

How Can I Support You?

Dr. Andrea Dinardo Empathic Listen

In doing so, I create a safe space for healing and acceptance.

Something we all need right now, more than ever before.

Unconditional love and support.

To be witnessed. To be heard.

All good conversation begins with listening.

Only then can we transformed by what we learn. 🌎💞

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The Space Between No Longer and Not Yet

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Hope, Personal Growth, Self Reflection44 Comments
Honour the Space

The time in between is a difficult time for all of us.

Myself included.

A super organized (type A) person like me becomes a little unhinged in the space in between.

But don’t we all?

In Between

Wondering if we still have what it takes.

Hoping we can still make a difference in the world when the pandemic ends.

Which is why I wrote this post today.

Highlighting the shared challenge we all face between the old and the new.

Change is a lifelong process.

The only constant is change.

Let yourself feel what you need to feel.

Take a breath. Enjoy some rest.

Give your monkey mind a break.

In Between Quotes

It’s ok to not be ok.

What comes also goes.

Honour the space in between.

Related Post: Divine Timing

Psychology Insights: Self Criticism to Self Compassion

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn empowerment, Happiness, health, Hope, Inspiration, Mindfulness, Peace, Personal Growth, psychology, Video65 Comments

Why are we so hard on ourselves DrAndreaDinardo.com

WHY ARE WE SO HARD ON OURSELVES?

Great question!

One that I’m asked often. And one that I often ask myself.

PSYCHOLOGY INSIGHTS

What causes this behaviour?

The answer is multifaceted and includes several factors including how we were parented (when internalized superego and conscience first develops) and eventually how we parent ourselves.

For example:

When something goes wrong, how do you respond?

1. Self Criticism versus Self Compassion

2. Self Control versus Self Love and Understanding 

PSYCHOLOGY SOLUTIONS

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How do I make the shift from self criticism to self compassion?

1. Pay attention to where your self judgements originated.

Is this your personal measure of worthiness or society’s expectation of success?

2. Investigate how truly arbitrary the standards you set for yourself are.

For example, who said you had to weigh 125 lbs, have a million dollars in the bank, and be married by 30?

3. Don’t Believe Everything You Think!

  • Watch this short video for additional insights into the developmental origins of toxic self criticism, unrealistic standards, and the SUPERego.

“Be kinder to yourself. And let your kindness flood the world.”

Stay Open to the Possibilities

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn community, Hope, Intrinsic Motivation, Optimism, personality, Psychology Class, Thriving27 Comments

Embrace Uncertainty

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One of my favourite ways to energize before teaching psychology classes at St. Clair College is to summarize a theory in practical and concrete ways in the parking lot.

Literally! 🚘 

I filmed this video 5 minutes before I was about to teach a lecture on personality and positive psychology in my liberal arts class.

Just a few weeks before all St. Clair College classes went fully online due to COVID-19.

In the video above, I talk about the connection between openness and happiness. Openness to experience is one of the Big 5 Personality traits – see figure below.

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Why Openness?

The more open, adventurous, and flexible we are in our thinking (and being), the more likely we are to perceive ambiguity as a pathway to something new and exciting.

A whole new road, yet to be discovered.

openness

Today’s Psychology Lesson

We never know what’s waiting on the other side of COVID uncertainty.

So let’s stay open to the possibilities. 

Trust and believe in our shared journey. 

Even if we can’t see the outcome. 

Together in faith, anything is possible!

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