What is within your control?

Locus of Control is a key ingredient in both stress hardiness and mental resilience.

Knowing the difference between what is within your control and sphere of influence and what to let go of and surrender is a daily process and wellness habit.

What is within your control?

This was a question I actively explored over 2 days with 600 high school students in Windsor, Ontario during my thriving under pressure presentation.

PSYCHOLOGY HOMEWORK

Make a list of things that are beyond your control. Areas of your life that drain your energy, motivation, and passion for life.

Next, make a list of moments and situations that lift you up. Areas where you create impact. Focus on those areas of your life today. Surrender the rest.

You Can’t Add More to Your Life Without First Letting Go

Video: What is within your control?

Put a Time Limit on Negativity

Original Source: The Drive Magazine

Time and Energy Management

When I was a kid, my mom set the egg timer for almost everything we did.

Whether it was how long we spent doing our homework, weeding the garden, watching television, or complaining about life’s challenges.

1. Passing versus Permanent Difficulties

Setting a time limit helped us understand that nothing lasts forever, good or bad.

This was especially important when we felt helpless over things we did not have control over, including chores we did not want to do.

2. Energy and Emotional Awareness

The egg timer principle can also be applied to how often we feel negative versus positive throughout the day.

Venting our negative emotions feels good in the moment, but when it goes on too long, the costs outweigh the benefits.

Too often we complain about stressors for hours beyond the momentary challenge.

Leaving little time in the day for appreciation, wonder, and gratitude.

Then one day we wake up and realize that life is too short to be all negative, all the time.

Interview with Candace Sampson on energy management 

3. Respecting Other People’s Boundaries

Setting time limits taught us to respect how our words and actions impact others.

We learned the importance of asking permission before sharing our problems and difficulties.

Boundaries go both ways, and few people have the capacity to listen seven days of the week.

Interview with Arms Bumanlag on relationship boundaries

4. Timer Motivation Technique

To this day I set a timer on the microwave or my cellphone.

A simple, yet effective way to motivate myself through tedious tasks and become more mindful of time itself.

Final Thoughts

Negativity is to be expected. It’s part of the human experience. The question is: how long will you stay there?

Share your challenges. Share your obstacles. Share your difficulties. But also leave room for what’s good in your life.

Joy needs room to breathe. And so do you.

Psychology Articles in The Drive Magazine