Tag: compassion

Psychology Insights: Self Criticism to Self Compassion

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn empowerment, Happiness, health, Hope, Inspiration, Mindfulness, Peace, Personal Growth, psychology, Video52 Comments

Why are we so hard on ourselves DrAndreaDinardo.com

WHY ARE WE SO HARD ON OURSELVES?

Great question!

One that I’m asked often. And one that I often ask myself.

PSYCHOLOGY INSIGHTS

What causes this behaviour?

The answer is multifaceted and includes several factors including how we were parented (when internalized superego and conscience first develops) and eventually how we parent ourselves.

For example:

When something goes wrong, how do you respond?

1. Self Criticism versus Self Compassion

2. Self Control versus Self Love and Understanding 

PSYCHOLOGY SOLUTIONS

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How do I make the shift from self criticism to self compassion?

1. Pay attention to where your self judgements originated.

Is this your personal measure of worthiness or society’s expectation of success?

2. Investigate how truly arbitrary the standards you set for yourself are.

For example, who said you had to weigh 125 lbs, have a million dollars in the bank, and be married by 30?

3. Don’t Believe Everything You Think!

  • Watch this short video for additional insights into the developmental origins of toxic self criticism, unrealistic standards, and the SUPERego.

“Be kinder to yourself. And let your kindness flood the world.”

Anxiety Relief Technique: What’s Under the Fear?

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Affirmation, Peace, Reflection Question, Strengths, Stress Relief and Release, Video26 Comments

Shifting from Fear to Peace

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The 5 WHYS is a simple and effective technique for getting under the fear one why at a time.

The goal is to discover the root source of what causes stress or anxiety in a particular time, place, or situation.

With the ultimate intention of enhancing inner peace, self-compassion, and understanding.

BELOW THE SURFACE PSYCHOLOGY

Try the 5 WHYS technique along with me (click here to participate) and let me know what you discover! Dr. D 💖

Empowering Conversations.

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn empowerment, Psychology Class, resources, Strengths, Student Engagement, The Drive Magazine, Video21 Comments

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In today’s psychology class, we discussed how important it is to empower friends, family, and clients going through difficult times.

And how even if we’re an expert in psychology, medicine, or business – it does not make us the master of someone else’s life.86413B3A-117A-451E-9318-CB334FF5E5CC

Together we explored strength based techniques for uplifting and encouraging others in conversation and in daily life.

Acknowledging that we still have so much left to learn about friends and family.

And the only way to do this is to create an inviting listening space between ourselves and the people we meet.

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Next Steps

Helpful tips for enhancing conversations with clients and family members can be found in the June article in The Drive Magazine (click here) and in the psychology video below —

The Story Behind the Story

This post was inspired by my sister Noelle.

12BB321D-E44A-4F1F-A3DF-D616562A0831“When my sister was 19, she had a brain aneurysm. Every day since, she has struggled to maintain her independence and financial security.

Despite her trauma, Noelle continues to thrive in unexpected and beautiful ways. She never gives up, no matter what comes her way. Over the years, I have discovered the difference it makes when I support Noelle from her perspective, rather than dictating what she needs.”

Excerpt from The Drive Magazine | Issue 122, p. 49

EMPOWERING

Someone with a Brain Injury

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Written with the help of my sister ❤️

The domino effect.

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn community, Happiness, Hope, Inspiration, kindness, Mental Health, Peace, positivity

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Smile like you’re changing the world. Because you are. 🌸

We often think of changing of the world as some great big, grand gesture. Performed on stage with millions of people watching. When in fact it’s just you and me (and 7 billion others). Smiling, connecting, caring, and loving. Every moment. Every encounter. We are the dominos.

Related Post: What if our only life purpose was to be kind?

Compassion heals.

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn community, Hope, Mental Health, Peace, Personal Growth40 Comments

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Listening heals more hearts than talking ever will.

In my early thirties I was going through a particularly tough time in my life.

A trifecta of life events where every pillar in my world came tumbling down.

Out of all the sadness, the times that I remember the most were the small joys and simple pleasures with my family and friends.

No matter how complicated and messy life became, it was their unwavering support that pulled me through.

“Just being there” is more powerful than most people realize.

Afternoons with my Dad walking down country roads. Weekends with my Mom at the dollar store. Sundays with my big sister at Tim Hortons.

Surprise phone calls from my two brothers. Relaxing with old friends in their cozy homes  — long past the time and energy they initially had for me.

The best kind of love is simple. It creates a safe space to lose yourself and find yourself all over again. No words necessary.

Listening heals more hearts than talking ever will.

Related Post: It’s ok to not be ok.

The Paradox of Strength.

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn courage, Emotional Awareness, empowerment, Hope, Inspiration, Resilience, Strengths, Thriving71 Comments

Some lessons happen over a lifetime. Others happen in an instant.

Either way, the paradox of strength is that it develops though pain.

Each misfortune cultivates a renewed appreciation.

Each obstacle fosters a new level of perseverance.

Each sadness teaches a greater depth of compassion.

Each challenge harvests a new field of possibilities.

We must fall down to rise up.

Again and again and again.

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Related Post: I've never met a strong person with an easy past.

Every smile counts.

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn community, Hope, Inspiration, kindness, Peace, positivity26 Comments

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Smile like you’re changing the world. Because you are. 🌸

We often think of changing of the world as some great big, grand gesture. Performed on stage with millions of people watching. When in fact it’s just you and me (and 7 billion others). Smiling, connecting, caring, and loving. Every moment. Every encounter. We are the dominos.

Related Post: What if our only life purpose was to be kind?

What if our only life purpose was to be kind?

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn community, Hope, Love, Purpose and Meaning, Self Actualization53 Comments

What if our only life purpose was to be kind?

What if every decision we made was guided by this shared life purpose?

How would you change? How would the world change?

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Life purpose is a way of living and giving. 

It does not require a title or a corner office.

Life purpose is a way of being in this world.

Today be kind. 💙

“Be the reason someone believes in the goodness of people.”

From Fear to Love.

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Affirmation, empowerment, Love, Mental Health, Peace, positivity, Resilience, Self-Care23 Comments

How do you talk to yourself?

Have you ever noticed that the more challenging life gets ⇒ the more critical you are of yourself.

And the more critical you are of yourself ⇒ the more challenging life becomes.

It’s a fearful, exhausting, repetitive loop that feeds on itself.

When you’re under extreme pressure, the last thing you need is another self-talk rant of why you’re not good enough.

What you do need is a boatload of unconditional love.

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 Resilience is built on love. And so are you.

Today vow to give yourself the gift of more love, more kindness, more generosity.

A gift that will keep on giving. Long after the stress is gone.

Find an affirmation or a positive quote that makes you stop, take a breath, and feel your heart beating deep inside.

Something that reminds you of how magical you truly are.

Post it on your fridge. Write it on your mirror. Save it on your phone.

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Stress is surviving. Love is thriving.

The next time you start beating yourself up over the smallest thing, take it as a sign that you need some extra love and tender care.

The more love you give yourself, the more generous, authentic, and compassionate all of your relationships will be.

Including the relationship you have with your innermost self.

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Repeat after me. ❤️