Surrender is not giving up.
Surrender is not giving in.
It’s trusting in something so much bigger than yourself.
Something you can’t quite see.
Slowly unfolding.
Quietly expanding.
In your favour.
Behind the scenes.
Video of Post: Click Here
Category: Stress Relief and Release
Enjoy Every Moment
Never let the things you want make you forget the things you already have.
Nothing Lasts Forever.
Good or Bad.
Enjoy Every Moment.
Embrace it.
Be it.
See it.
Everything you appreciate is you reflecting back.
Homework for Today
Look Around You.
Notice Things Like You Are Seeing Them for the Very First Time.
Watch Video Of Post: Click Here
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Freedom is realizing you have a choice.
Freedom doesn’t come from holding on.
Freedom comes from letting go.
Again and again and again.
Too often we are hard on ourselves for having to release the same thought, emotion, person, or situation over and over again.
When in fact this is how life goes.
Letting go and surrendering are an ongoing process. And as necessary for our mental health as eating is for our physical health.
We must eat three times a day. And sometimes we have to surrender (thirty) three times a day.
And that’s ok. That’s how life flows..
F R E E D O M
If you only had ONE YEAR to live:
What would you STOP doing?
THE CHOICE IS YOURS
Video of Blog Post: Click Here
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Emotional Freedom Technique for Social Anxiety & Imaginary Audience
Have you ever felt like you’re being watched?
Judged and scrutinized.
Like all eyes are on you and every potential error you make?
Everyone experiences this phenomenon from time to time, especially when trying out something for the first time.
Think back to the first time you gave a dinner party, swung a golf club, wrote a college exam, or posted your first blog online.
Social Anxiety and Heightened Experiences
Individuals with social anxiety experience this sense of being watched (and thought about) significantly more than the average person.
Independent of skills and expertise.
Why is this the case?
The Imaginary Audience
One potential explanation is a psychological phenomenon called imaginary audience experienced frequently in adolescence.
- A concept first introduced by social psychologists David Elkind and Erik Erikson in the 1960’s.
Think back to how easily embarrassed you were as a teenager.
- If you wore the “wrong shirt” to school, it felt like everyone was gossiping about you and your entire social life would end as a result.
Resulting in perpetual self-consciousness, distorted views of how others saw you, causing in a tendency to conform for fear of sticking out.
- Limiting your freedom to express outside the norm for fear of collective banishment and reprisal.
What does the research say?
Using the Imaginary Audience Scale as a Measure of Social Anxiety in Young Adults
Two studies explored imaginary audience phenomenon among college students.
Imaginary audience behavior was found to be related to measures of social anxiety, self perception, and personality.
Furthermore, imaginary audience scores were more strongly related to anxiety than abstract reasoning.
These results suggest that imaginary audience experiences that persist into early adulthood have more to do with social anxiety than with cognitive development.
Original Source: Click Here
Simple Things on Repeat
The next time you imagine you are being watched, talked about, or judged by others, remember that imaginary audience IS AN ILLUSION heightened by social media, physiology (eg., lack of sleep), and overthinking.
- When in truth, people are so focused on themselves (and their phones), that there is a 99% chance that no one cares what you are up to or how you are performing.
This is a very good thing!
CARPE DIEM
Today’s Freedom Mantra
Live like nobody’s watching. Love like nobody’s watching. Succeed like nobody’s watching. Fail like nobody’s watching. Write like nobody’s watching!
Video of Post ⇒ Click Here
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Uplifting Mantras for Uncertain Times.
Life lived backwards makes perfect sense.
You finally understand WHY the job, the partner, the degree, the house, the friendship, the ______ didn’t work out.
BUT what about in the “here and now”?
How do we make the leap of faith during the darkest of days?
MANTRAS mantras mantras.
Find a phrase that moves you …
t h r o u g h ..
UP AND OVER…
into a place of trust and belief.
Respect
The
Process
Breathe and RECEIVE
Your journey is unfolding in the most magical and mysterious of ways.
Spread Your Wings 🦋
“What if I fall … oh my darling … what if you F L Y..”
Related: Optimism Bootcamp Workshop
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Free Yourself 🦋
EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE
1. What would you stop doing if you only had one year to live?
2. What would you start doing if you only had one year to live?
3. What do you need to let go of to feel a sense of happiness, well-being, and peace?
4. What and who do you no longer want to be obligated to?
5. What joy do you wish you had more time for?
CONTEMPLATION TIME
Take a long deep breath and meditate on your answers. You’ll be surprised at what your soul has to say.
YOU GET ONE LIFE.
Make it yours.
Dear Readers:
This video is equally a note to you + me reminding us to live with discernment and wisdom. For not everyone in our life appreciates the limits of our time and energy. And that’s ok. For we are the magic wand. We have the power to make choices. We have the ability to overcome social conditioning. We have the authority to change what and who we want in our lives. What and who we give our energy to unnecessarily, repeatedly, unconsciously.
WE HAVE THE POWER TO CHOOSE.
This ^ is freedom.
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Mental Health Awareness & Education
In Celebration of Mental Health Awareness Month in Canada
In this video, I share an overview of my latest psychology article in The Drive Magazine (May, Issue 121). An issue devoted entirely to mental health awareness, treatment, and prevention. With the ultimate goal of ending the stigma of mental illness.
Instead of thinking of mental health as a burden to be shouldered, imagine it as an opportunity to experience peace and joy. In the same way that we make time for our physical needs (eating and sleeping) we must devote attention to our psychological needs.
Excerpt from The Drive Magazine, Issue 121, pages 58-60.
Building a mental health reserve
In the psychology article and in the video below, I discuss the importance of daily self-care as a preventative and restorative health strategy using the PERMA Model of Well-Being.
In the same way we save money to buy our dream home, it is critical that we contribute daily to our mental health bank account. Health is wealth after all!
Everything little bit counts. Everything adds up. Spa coffee dates especially. ☕️💗
Read Magazine Article ⇒ Click Here Well-Being Workshop ⇒ Click Here
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Breathe. Trust. Let go.
Trust that everything is working out as it should. In divine time. In divine order. For your highest good.
Video: Let Go and Flow
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You hold the key.
Even though we often have little control over the “outside forces” in our lives, we can always make a positive difference – from the inside out.
Start here. Right here. Right now. Be still. Breathe in gratitude. Be thankful for this very moment. Start small. Notice your passing thoughts. Let go.
Awareness empowers.
Notice the exact time it is right now. Say today’s date out loud. Look up at the sky. Wink at the clouds. Stomp your feet on the floor. Smile with gusto.
Slowly bring yourself back to this moment.
Grab onto the coffee mug you are holding. Inhale the rich scent of the sumatra you are drinking. Feel the warmth of each passing breath.
Feel the texture of the clothes you’re wearing. Wake up to the sound of your voice. Whisper. Sing. Shout it out!
Dance a little dance. Stand up tall. Anything and everything that shifts you from outer space to inner spirit. From not enough to overflowing.
Positive change begins within.
Come back to yourself. Back to the grace of your magnificent spirit. Into the beauty of your incredible form. Feel the rhythm of your beating heart. Sense the pulse of life itself.
Everything you need to transform yourself and the world already exists within you. You matter. You truly matter. But you have to believe it to see it. Feel it to know it. One gentle, uplifting thought at a time.
You hold the key.
Originally published on March 1 2017
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One Minute Meditation | Stress to Growth Reframing
“To make the growth choice instead of the fear choice a dozen times a day is to move a dozen times a day towards self-actualization.”
Re-imagine stressful moments as growth moments.
Opportunities moving you one step, one breath, one moment closer to your dreams.
One thought debilitates.
The other levitates. 🍃
I hope you enjoy my one minute meditation retreat.
Visit my YouTube Channel for more psychology videos.
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What are you ready to let go of?
This post was inspired by a stressful situation that I couldn’t let go of, long beyond its solution. No matter how hard I tried. Day in day out. The worry would reappear. Then someone close to me suggested “I shed the stress”. And a lightbulb went off. Each time the repetitive thought appeared, I imagined a tree shedding its leaves. A golden leaf for every anxious thought. This visualization process made all the difference. And so did writing about it. 📝🍂
If you had a magic wand, what would you ask to disappear in your life right now?
What would you say good-bye to?
Once and for all.
It could be an emotion. Or a thought.
A relationship. Or a job.
A place or a thing.
Stress management is a shedding process ℘ Not an acquisition project
It’s time to let go of what drains you.
Let go of what holds you back.
Let go of what keeps you down.
It could be a mindset. Or a memory.
A situation. Or an attitude.
Write it down. Shout it out.
Stress management is a shedding process ℘ Not a holding pattern
It’s time to let go of what weighs you down.
Release it to the universe.
Declare your freedom.
Vow to move on and beyond.
Once and for all.
Stress management is a shedding process ℘ Not an endurance test
Shed the stress. Let. It. Fall. 🍂
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Remember to breathe.
Sometimes it’s the smallest things that have the greatest impact on our happiness.
Something so close, so within reach, we often forget it was there in the first place. The good night’s sleep we’re yearning for; waiting patiently at the end of each day. The connection to nature we’re searching for; available 24/7 just beyond our front door. That extra deep breath; we frequently forget to take.
You possess a power so magnificent, so liberating, right under your nose.
Breathing is one of the few physiological functions that can be controlled both consciously and unconsciously.
When everything feels out of control, breathing is the one thing that will always be within our control. The times we’re under the most amount of stress is the exact time we need to expand our breathing – not restrict it.
We must become conscious of breath.
The next time you’re under any kind of pressure. Stuck in traffic. Rushing from class to class. Dealing with a difficult customer at work. Desperately trying to recall answers on a final exam. Wake up to the formidable power that exists within you. Right here. Right now. Right under your nose.
The deeper the breath. The deeper the peace.
Video of Post: https://youtu.be/zRSQw-LjU8k
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Breathing Space.
Look up ↑ Breathe ↑ Release
One quick glance to inner peace.
Related Post: Always Looking Up.
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Less fight. More serenity.
The next time you’re gearing up for another big fight with reality.
Morning Traffic
Office Politics
Loud Neighbours
Unpredictable Weather
Try rolling with it.
Giving up the fight.
Waving the white flag.
Surrendering to what is.
And always has been.
The upside.
You conserve energy for the joyful in your life.
The meaningful in your life.
The soulful in your life.
Including this very moment.
This is where your life SHINES.
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Make room for destiny
Are you ready to move on but are reluctant to let something go?
Letting go is not giving up.
Letting go is not giving in.
When you let go you make space for something better.
When you let go you generate energy needed for moving forward.
Close your eyes. Clear your heart.
Breathe.
Let go of what no longer serves you.
Let go of what weighs you down.
Release.
In doing so, you make room for destiny.
Your highest purpose. Your greatest calling.
Your ultimate joy!
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Always looking up.
I look up every chance I get. First thing in the morning. On my run. On my way to work. In between classes. Out for a bike ride. From the skylight in my office. On the front porch before I go to sleep.
Connected to Something Bigger
The sky connects us to something much bigger than ourselves. Challenges seem small in comparison to the vastness of the sky. Solutions seem plausible. Answers come more easily.
The stars heighten our awareness, expand our field of possibilities, and relax our mind. In their presence, we embrace the profound and surrender the pettiness. When we look up, we become fully present. In the moment. Completely mindful. Nowhere else to be but one with the sky above.
Peace of Mind
The celestial bodies provide a sense of comfort, peace of mind, and well-being. No matter what happens, the sun will rise, the stars will shine, and the moon will glow.
Blazing sunsets, radiant full moons, and shimmering constellations are all reassuring reminders that we are in this life together. We are united. We share the same magnificent celestial view. No matter what happens, we share equal access to the divine, all-powerful universe. We are one. We are never alone.
From Me to We
Recent research at the University of California confirms that a “me to we” transformation takes place when exposed to nature. The study found that inducing a sense of awe (e.g., star gazing; looking at the ocean) in participants shifted their focus from personal needs (small self) to greater concern for society at large (altruistic behaviour).
“Inducing a sense of awe in people can promote altruistic, helpful and positive social behavior, according to research. Awe is that sense of wonder we feel in the presence of something vast that transcends our understanding of the world. People commonly experience awe in nature, but also in response to religion, art and even music. When experiencing awe, you may not, egocentrically speaking, feel like you’re at the centre of the world anymore. By diminishing the emphasis on the individual self, awe may encourage people to forgo strict self-interest to improve the welfare of others.” Source: Science Daily
“The sun, the moon, and the stars are there to guide us.” Dennis Banks
I am starstruck every time I look up. I am in awe. The sun, the moon, and the stars are the true celebrities in our universe. Always shining. Always inspiring. Always showing us the way.
What lights your way?
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The peace you’ve been searching for.
Bring yourself back to the present moment.
One long deep breath at a time.
Herein lies the peace you’ve been searching for.
All day long.
Related Post: Just Breathe.
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Trust the music.
Stop expecting others to validate what you hear (see and feel).
The music is not “out there”.
The music is in you.
A beautiful melody that only you can hear.
Listen. Be still. Take a long deep breath.
Fear not who you are. Fear not what you hear.
You are the symphony.
Trust the music that is in you.
And dance a little freedom dance.
For all the world to see.
Related Post: I believe in you.
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How will you thrive today?
So many choices when it comes to stress relief.
Which one will you choose today?
Psychology Today Checklist ⇒ Are You Thriving? 🌷
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The Art of Allowing.
Today vow to allow life to happen on its own terms, not your own. Sometimes your greatest power is in letting things go.
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You hold the key.
Even though we often have little control over the “outside forces” in our lives, we can always make a positive difference – from the inside out.
Start here. Right here. Right now. Be still. Breathe in gratitude. Be thankful for this very moment. Start small. Notice your passing thoughts. Let go.
Awareness empowers.
Notice the exact time it is right now. Say today’s date out loud. Look up at the sky. Wink at the clouds. Stomp your feet on the floor. Smile with gusto.
Slowly bring yourself back to this moment.
Grab onto the coffee mug you are holding. Inhale the rich scent of the sumatra you are drinking. Feel the warmth of each passing breath.
Feel the texture of the clothes you’re wearing. Wake up to the sound of your voice. Whisper. Sing. Shout it out!
Dance a little dance. Stand up tall. Anything and everything that shifts you from outer space to inner spirit. From not enough to overflowing.
Positive change begins within.
Come back to yourself. Back to the grace of your magnificent spirit. Into the beauty of your incredible form. Feel the rhythm of your beating heart. Sense the pulse of life itself.
Everything you need to transform yourself and the world already exists within you. You matter. You truly matter. But you have to believe it to see it. Feel it to know it. One gentle, uplifting thought at a time.
You hold the key.
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The healing power of imagination.
What images give you a sense of safety and protection in the midst of fearful thoughts?
I imagine angels in the sky and lions at my feet. You: What images shift you from fear to safety?
Related Research ⇒ The Effects of Guided Imagery on Anxiety
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The Sweet Spot.
Nowhere else to be.
That moment in the day when you realize “you’ve arrived”.
And the most interesting part is that you haven’t gone anywhere.
Instead, you finally come home to the present moment.
The here and now. The sweet spot.
No where else to be. But here and now.
Right Here. Right Now.
This picture is from a retreat I did with one of my best friends nine years ago. The speaker asked each participant to share when they felt most at peace.
Each participant shared a different story. From when their newborn baby finally slept through the night to when they finally received their promotion at work to when their boyfriend finally proposed.
My answer was (unexpectedly) simple. I shared that I felt most at peace in that very moment. “No were else to be. But here and now.”
Wide Awake to Everything.
I had finally found my sweet spot. A place where “all is well” no matter the circumstances. A place I had been before. But failed to recognize.
A place positive psychologists call flow, and alternatively, mindfulness. A sweet spot that sparkles. Lights up. Expands. Stands still. Speeds up. And flows..
Running. Teaching. Encouraging. Writing. Laughing. Helping.
A sweetness I now easily recognize in the course of each day. That moment when I am wide awake to everything. To every sight. To every sound.
No judgements. No resistance. Simply accepting what is. And what will be.
How do you know when you’ve finally “arrived” to the present moment? What does your “sweet spot” look & feel like?
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Just Breathe.
Sometimes it’s the smallest things that have the greatest impact on our happiness.
Something so close, so within reach, we often forget it was there in the first place. The good night’s sleep we’re yearning for.. waiting patiently at the end of each day. The connection to nature we’re searching for.. available 24/7 just beyond our front door. That extra deep breath.. we so often forget to take.
You possess a power so magnificent, so liberating, right under your nose.
Breathing is one of the few physiological functions that can be controlled both consciously and unconsciously.
When everything feels out of control, breathing is the one thing that will always be within our control. The times we’re under the most amount of stress is the exact time we need to expand our breathing – not restrict it.
We must become conscious of breath.
The next time you’re under any kind of pressure. Stuck in traffic. Rushing from class to class. Dealing with a difficult customer at work. Desperately trying to recall answers on a final exam. Wake up to the formidable power that exists within you. Right here. Right now. Right under your nose. Breathe.
