Taken one step further, time defines who we are, and ultimately who we become.
How we live our days is how we live our lives.
Moments → Hours → Days → Months → Lifetimes
Mindful Time Management
Which is why the more conscious and aware we become about how we spend and prioritize our time, the more meaningful and satisfying our lives will become.
Even though we often have little control over the “outside forces” in our lives, we can always make a positive difference – from the inside out.
Start here. Right here. Right now. Be still. Breathe in gratitude. Be thankful for this very moment. Start small. Notice your passing thoughts. Let go.
Awareness empowers.
Notice the exact time it is right now. Say today’s date out loud. Look up at the sky. Wink at the clouds. Stomp your feet on the floor. Smile with gusto.
Slowly bring yourself back to this moment.
Grab onto the coffee mug you are holding. Inhale the rich scent of the sumatra you are drinking. Feel the warmth of each passing breath.
Feel the texture of the clothes you’re wearing. Wake up to the sound of your voice. Whisper. Sing. Shout it out!
Dance a little dance. Stand up tall. Anything and everything that shifts you from outer space to inner spirit. Fromnot enough to overflowing.
Positive change begins within.
Come back to yourself. Back to the grace of your magnificent spirit. Into the beauty of your incredible form. Feel the rhythm of your beating heart. Sense the pulse of life itself.
Everything you need to transform yourself and the world already exists within you. You matter. You truly matter. But you have to believe it to see it. Feel it to know it. One gentle, uplifting thought at a time.
This post was inspired by a stressful situation that I couldn’t let go of, long beyond its solution. No matter how hard I tried. Day in day out. The worry would reappear. Then someone close to me suggested “I shed the stress”. And a lightbulb went off. Each time the repetitive thought appeared, I imagined a tree shedding its leaves. A golden leaf for every anxious thought. This visualization process made all the difference. And so did writing about it. 📝🍂
If you had a magic wand, what would you ask to disappear in your life right now?
What would you say good-bye to?
Once and for all.
It could be an emotion. Or a thought.
A relationship. Or a job.
A place or a thing.
Stress management is a shedding process ℘ Not an acquisition project
It’s time to let go of what drains you.
Let go of what holds you back.
Let go of what keeps you down.
It could be a mindset. Or a memory.
A situation. Or an attitude.
Write it down. Shout it out.
Stress management is a shedding process ℘Not a holding pattern
It’s time to let go of what weighs you down.
Release it to the universe.
Declare your freedom.
Vow to move on and beyond.
Once and for all.
Stress management is a shedding process ℘ Not an endurance test
I write it on my bathroom mirror. I post it on my refrigerator door. I tape it to my office wall. I speak of it every time I teach.
These 4 words remind me to focus on what’s good, what’s working, what’s infinitely possible. Even (especially) when everything is going wrong.
Focus on the good.
Because if I can find one good thing in the course of a day, I have found my reason to live, to love, and to lead.
Sometimes the blessings are obvious. Sometimes they’re hidden. Sometimes it’s simply breathing. Other times “it’s the moments that take my breath away”.
Mantras wake us up.
Mantras work because they wake us up. Snap us out of it. They carry us from the perpetual loop of our worries to the equanimity of present time.
For we all need a gentle nudge in the right direction. A loving reminder to come back to reality.
Or we’ll all be too busy looking down that we miss the beauty of what’s right in front of us. Life itself. 💙
When life changes direction, are you able to change with it?
Are you flexible and open to new experiences?
Are you able to break free from old patterns and habits?
Or do you struggle to adapt to anything new and different?
Flexibility and Change
In this interview on CBC-TV, Chris Hyndman and I examine the psychology of change. Including how individual differences (e.g., Type A vs. Type B, Optimist vs. Pessimist) impact how we respond to change. We also share 5 ways to embrace change. Including staying open and receptive to new beginnings and unexpected opportunities.
I was thinking about time tonight. It’s like a never ending circle that starts and stops at the same place. A perpetual loop heightened on a Sunday night.
And the only way to slow it down is to breathe in each moment. To notice each ephemeral hour. To rest gently in the arms of time.
Do you trust the process / evolution of your life?
Do you stir the pot before it boils? Do you open the oven before it bakes?
Or do you relax on the sofa trusting the recipe and the time it takes?
Not long ago, I was interviewed by Adam Rochon on the topic of transformational change.
During the podcast interview, Adam and I explored a different way of thinking about change.
A more uplifting and empowering take on transformation.
Adam and I discussed how the key to lasting change isn’t to push yourself harder.
The key to lasting change is to understand yourself better.
To accept yourself more. And to judge yourself less.
Trust the timing of your life.
Your good and bad habits did not develop overnight.
And neither does transformational change.
Ultimately to grow, we must trust, let go, and learn to respect the process.
Excerpt from my interview with Adam Rochon: “For me respecting the process in my own life and in all the people I’m blessed enough to meet, is to realize the process is so much bigger than I am. It is our destiny. It is the 100 years – if we are ever that lucky to live on this earth. Whatever we experience, good or bad, is just a day in the life and that we need to pay attention to where we are. When we get stressed out, overwhelmed and are going through a lot of changes, take a step back and realize that there are so many forces at work that are greater than we are – which is the process. When we Respect the Process everything just falls into place. It sounds simple, but you need to just let go of what you don’t have control over and be inspired by the process.” Episode #15: Transformational Change.
Click here for access to full podcast interview. 🦋
Even though we often have little control over the “outside forces” in our lives, we can always make a positive difference – from the inside out.
Start here. Right here. Right now. Be still. Breathe in gratitude. Be thankful for this very moment. Start small. Notice your passing thoughts. Let go.
Awareness empowers.
Notice the exact time it is right now. Say today’s date out loud. Look up at the sky. Wink at the clouds. Stomp your feet on the floor. Smile with gusto.
Slowly bring yourself back to this moment.
Grab onto the coffee mug you are holding. Inhale the rich scent of the sumatra you are drinking. Feel the warmth of each passing breath.
Feel the texture of the clothes you’re wearing. Wake up to the sound of your voice. Whisper. Sing. Shout it out!
Dance a little dance. Stand up tall. Anything and everything that shifts you from outer space to inner spirit. Fromnot enough to overflowing.
Positive change begins within.
Come back to yourself. Back to the grace of your magnificent spirit. Into the beauty of your incredible form. Feel the rhythm of your beating heart. Sense the pulse of life itself.
Everything you need to transform yourself and the world already exists within you. You matter. You truly matter. But you have to believe it to see it. Feel it to know it. One gentle, uplifting thought at a time.
I love questions like this because they encourage me to dig deep, reflect, and imagine new ways of perceiving stress.
Stress Thresholds
Tipping points and thresholds are often used synonymously in the literature. Especially when discussing economic, historical, and ecological phenomenon.
That said, there is a clear distinction between thresholds and tipping points in psychological applications.
Thresholds are more individual (unique to each person), while tipping points are more universal (shared by the majority).
Which is why I see each person’s stress response as more of a stress threshold than a tipping point.
Thresholds vary from person to person (e.g., Type A vs. Type B), situation to situation (e.g., Work vs. Personal), and are based on individual strengths, challenges, and personal history.
See diagram above to help understand how thresholds affect your individual stress response. This graphic also depicts why a certain level of stress (below threshold) can be good for you.
Assess when you cross the threshold from your optimal stress zone (eustress) into your overload stress zone (distress).
Situational Stress, Anxiety, and Thresholds
We may be good at some things, but we are not great at everything.
For example, the more challenging academic work is for me (high stress threshold) the more I flourish. Mostly because this is my area of expertise.
While this is not the case with other areas of my life (low stress threshold) and thus I tend to react (too quickly) when under pressure in certain personal situations.
In addition to overall stress response patterns, thresholds differ from one situation to the next.
Situational fluctuations in thresholds reflect our strengths, challenges, and personal preferences.
Finally, I believe that our ability to cope and thrive under pressure is a lifelong practice. Something that is never mastered – only strengthened.
And the more we learn about life and ourselves, the higher our thresholds will become. As the majority of our stress is beating ourselves up – long after the stressor is gone.
3 C’s of Thriving Under Pressure
Reflection Questions About Stress
How does your stress threshold differ from others?
Compare your personal stress threshold to family members, friends, coworkers.
Are you the most high strung of your siblings?
Are you the most carefree teacher in the school?
In what situations is your stress threshold higher vs. lower?
Compare your situational stress threshold across multiple settings.
When do you stress out at work?
Is it only during public presentations?
In contrast, when are you more relaxed relaxed and easy going?
Are you more relaxed during independent work?
What are the benefits of stress and pressure in your life?
Trust that you are exactly where you need to be. Good or bad. High or low. East or west. Young or old. Be still. Have faith. Hold on. Stay strong. What you seek is seeking you.💙
That moment in the day when you realize “you’ve arrived”.
And the most interesting part is that you haven’t gone anywhere.
Instead, you finally come home to the present moment.
The here and now. The sweet spot.
No where else to be. But here and now.
Right Here. Right Now.
This picture is from a retreat I did with one of my best friends nine years ago. The speaker asked each participant to share when they felt most at peace.
Each participant shared a different story. From when their newborn baby finally slept through the night to when they finally received their promotion at work to when their boyfriend finally proposed.
My answer was (unexpectedly) simple. I shared that I felt most at peace in that very moment. “No were else to be. But here and now.”
Wide Awake to Everything.
I had finally found my sweet spot. A place where “all is well” no matter the circumstances. A place I had been before. But failed to recognize.
A place positive psychologists call flow, and alternatively, mindfulness. A sweet spot that sparkles. Lights up. Expands. Stands still. Speeds up. And flows..
Thriving Under Pressure 