Life is complicated. Stress management shouldn’t be.
5 Simple Techniques
1. Breathing Space
Repeat Daily. 💙
More Tips → Thriving Under Pressure
More Tips → Thriving Under Pressure
Instead of thinking of mental health as a burden you must shoulder, imagine it as an opportunity to experience peace and joy.
In the same way that we make time for our physical needs, we must devote equal attention to our psychological needs.
The model contains five key indicators of human flourishing: Positive Emotion, Engagement, Relationships, Meaning, Achievement.
This blog post first appeared in The Drive Magazine.
Feeling good is an essential part of well-being.
That said, it’s easy to get lost in a spiral of negativity — What’s wrong? Who’s to blame? Why did this happen to me? Leaving little time in the day for appreciation, wonder, and fun.
Which is why it’s essential to schedule good vibe moments into each day.
Here are some ideas:
And so do you.
Remember when you were a kid playing with friends, and before you knew it the street lights came on? If it wasn’t for your mom yelling your name, you would be outside playing all night long. In that moment, you were in a state of flow.
You were completely engaged in what you were doing, independent of everything around you.
Your mom could have called your name for hours, and you wouldn’t have heard a word.
One hundred percent of your attentional capacity was taken up by the activity right in front of you.
Most likely you still experience a state of flow and engagement, but not as often as you like.
Activities that create a flow state include:
Engagement and flow are important for mental health. When you’re completely absorbed by a task, your mind has no capacity left over for distressing thoughts and emotions.
Social support is an important buffer for life’s challenges.
That said, not all associations are created equal. Some relationships, unfortunately, lead to a deterioration in mental health.
Consider the following when you spend time with people:
Stay close to people who feel like sunshine.
Meaning comes from serving something bigger than ourselves.
Whether it be family, charity, occupation, or community, meaning unites us in a common vision and gives us the will to get through adversity.
Students Are My North Star
That said, meaning can appear elusive to some, so why not consider one purpose each day.
Begin with a typical workday. Choose one purpose, and do something to give meaning to that purpose.
I’ve listed a few options, as well as an example for each:
Achievement is the final component of the PERMA model, and, in many ways, its foundation. Goals give us a sense of achievement and satisfaction, helping us to know if we are headed in the right direction.
The key is to balance our drive and determination with the right level of difficulty. If we set a goal that’s too easy, we get bored. If it’s too hard, we experience learned helplessness.
Set daily goals that are achievable and tied into your highest dreams.
Cultivating mental health daily prepares us for the big things in our life. Every little bit counts, everything adds up. Small things on repeat change the world.
Video 1 of Blog Post ⇒ Click Here Video 2 of Blog Post ⇒ Click Here
With time, I have come to realize that failure has always been my greatest teacher. Each failure pointed me in a better direction and helped me to develop strength and authenticity, ultimately unveiling who I was and what I was destined to become
F. A. I. L. = First Attempt In Learning
• The failing grade I received on my first exam in graduate school taught me how to ask for support when I needed it most, no matter how shameful I felt or embarrassed I was.
• The end of a long-term relationship taught me how to value my time alone and make tough decisions for myself, no matter how weak I felt or lonesome I was.
• The layoff from a job I loved taught me how to let go, look forward, and trust in something so much bigger than myself, no matter how scared I was or irrelevant I felt.
“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”
Is it possible to see failure in a positive light?
Under the right conditions, failure strengthens us, adds to our self-knowledge, and enhances the quality of our lives
• If it weren’t for failure, I would not have met my husband John.
• If it weren’t for failure, I would not be a psychology professor.
• If it weren’t for failure, I would not have written three textbooks.
• If it weren’t for failure, I would not be the person I am today.
“Failure is the opportunity to begin again.”
What life lessons has failure taught you?
You finally understand WHY the job, the partner, the degree, the house, the friendship, the ______ didn’t work out.
BUT what about in the “here and now”?
How do we make the leap of faith during the darkest of days?
t h r o u g h ..
into a place of trust and belief.
Your journey is unfolding in the most magical and mysterious of ways.
“What if I fall … oh my darling … what if you F L Y..”
Related: Optimism Bootcamp Workshop
In the post below, I share lessons learned at a recent thriving student leadership teams workshop.
It was a true team effort! With the team-building and leadership exercises equally led by the student leaders and myself.
Please join in and explore the reflection questions, interactive activities, and workshop videos with the teams in your life.
Together Everyone Achieves More!
WHAT HELPS TEAMS FLOURISH & THRIVE?
“It takes both sides to build a bridge.”
Perspective taking exercise.
1. Identify a problem you have faced as a student leader.
2. Determine what’s “below the surface” that could potentially be the source of the problem.
3. Explore the problem from the perspective of the student.
4. Describe the problem and potential solution using both the leader’s and the student’s perspectives.
5. Summarize the lessons and potential opportunities of the original problem. Eg. What did you learn about yourself? What did you learn about the student?
“Together We Rise.”
“Goals with Soul.”
Personal and Team goal setting exercise.
1. What are your goals as student leader for the school year?
2. What are your goals as team member for the school year?
3. What are your greatest assets for the team?
4. What areas do you need assistance from the team?
“Teamwork makes the dream work.”
“Your life is your message to the world.”
“What’s Your North Star?” team building exercise.
1. What’s Your Purpose?
2. What Lights Your Way?
3. What Bonds and Unites Your Team?
“What’s Your Why?”
Watch this short video and consider the following questions:
Great things take time.
Stand up 8.
Your time to rise up!
This blog post and classroom video above are dedicated to all the students around the world struggling to stay motivated midway through the winter semester. I am cheering you on! Encouraging you to not give up. This post is also meant for you – My Fellow Student of Life. 📕❤️
Take a rest.
As often as you can.
Pause at the end of my video ⬆️ for 30 fun self-care ideas.
Please share in the comments below.
In my TEDx Talk I discuss how to THRIVE under pressure using 3 stress resilience tools: challenge, control and commitment.
If you like, please share my TEDx video with friends and family and on social media. The wider its reach, the more people I can help thrive under pressure!
No matter what happens today, know that in the end everything works out.
Trust me. I speak from experience.
My smile comes equally from a place of darkness and a place of light.
How would I ever know how good I have it today — if I hadn’t lived a life of challenge and adversity.
And the best part is that I get to revisit my twenties every single day.
A time where many of my life lessons were born.
Listening and learning with my psychology students on campus.
And staying in touch for years to come.
I will always be grateful for the tough times in my life — for this is where my strength lies.
I believe the same for you.
You are a diamond in the making.
This I know for sure. 💞💎
This blog post was written for all the students around the world writing final exams this week. Cheering them on! Encouraging them to not give up. This post is also meant for you – My Fellow Students of Life.