What is meant for you — is coming for you
E X P A N S I O N
happens in the space in between
Trust & Believe
You got this!
Video: Fostering A Growth Mindset 🍃
Category: Hope
Uplifting Mantras for Uncertain Times.
Life lived backwards makes perfect sense.
You finally understand WHY the job, the partner, the degree, the house, the friendship, the ______ didn’t work out.
BUT what about in the “here and now”?
How do we make the leap of faith during the darkest of days?
MANTRAS mantras mantras.
Find a phrase that moves you …
t h r o u g h ..
UP AND OVER…
into a place of trust and belief.
Respect
The
Process
Breathe and RECEIVE
Your journey is unfolding in the most magical and mysterious of ways.
Spread Your Wings 🦋
“What if I fall … oh my darling … what if you F L Y..”
Related: Optimism Bootcamp Workshop
Psychology Insights: Self Criticism to Self Compassion
WHY ARE WE SO HARD ON OURSELVES?
Great question!
One that I’m asked often. And one that I often ask myself.
PSYCHOLOGY INSIGHTS
What causes this behaviour?
The answer is multifaceted and includes several factors including how we were parented (when internalized superego and conscience first develops) and eventually how we parent ourselves.
For example:
When something goes wrong, how do you respond?
1. Self Criticism versus Self Compassion
2. Self Control versus Self Love and Understanding
PSYCHOLOGY SOLUTIONS
How do I make the shift from self criticism to self compassion?
1. Pay attention to where your self judgements originated.
Is this your personal measure of worthiness or society’s expectation of success?
2. Investigate how truly arbitrary the standards you set for yourself are.
For example, who said you had to weigh 125 lbs, have a million dollars in the bank, and be married by 30?
3. Don’t Believe Everything You Think!
Watch this short video for additional insights into the developmental origins of toxic self criticism, unrealistic standards, and the SUPERego.
“Be kinder to yourself. And let your kindness flood the world.”
VISIT PSYCHOLOGY YOUTUBE CHANNEL: https://m.youtube.com/c/DrAndreaDinardo
EMPOWERING THOUGHTS
Choose the THOUGHTS that emPOWER you today.
It takes
one word
one thought
one mantra
to shift our mind
from pain to power.
What will your empowering thought be this week?
I’d love to know.
Share your WORD in comments below ⤵️
Related Post: Empowering Conversations
Thanks for visiting my psychology blog!
Dr. D 💖☀️
Optimism Bootcamp for Health & Happiness.
Hope Lights The Way
Nathalie Begin author of the Gutsy Feeling Blog invited me to give a positive psychology workshop called Optimism Bootcamp at a Symposium for Crohn’s & Colitis Canada.
The audience was filled a very special group of people. Individuals that have been battling the chronic condition of Inflammatory bowel disease (IBD) their whole lives.
Click Here to join the workshop
What’s IBD?
Inflammatory bowel disease (IBD) describes a group of conditions, the two main forms of which are Crohn’s disease and ulcerative colitis. IBD also includes indeterminate colitis.
Crohn’s disease and ulcerative colitis are diseases that inflame the lining of the GI (gastrointestinal) tract and disrupt your body’s ability to digest food, absorb nutrition, and eliminate waste in a healthy manner.
Health Warriors
Individuals with chronic health problems such as IBD often feel a sense of helplessness and disempowerment over their bodies.
Which is why teaching concrete strategies for focusing on what’s within one’s control (beliefs and attitudes; deep breathing; present moment awareness) and letting go of what’s not (waiting times; IBD diagnosis; doctor availability) is so important.
Believing you can is half the battle.
Optimism Research
Research in health psychology shows that optimism and having hope in one’s future has a significant impact on whether patients follow through on medical advice.
Optimism has also been found to improve the overall quality of life, well-being, and happiness of cancer patients.
Click Here for Research on Health, Hope, and Optimism
“Hope changes everything. It transforms pessimism into optimism. It changes winter into summer, darkness into dawn, descent into ascent, barrenness into creativity, agony into joy.” Daisaku Ikeda
Optimism Can Be Learned
The good news is that optimism is a skill that can be learned!
- Optimism / pessimism are not fixed personality traits that someone is lucky (or unlucky) enough to be born with.
- Optimism / pessimism are states (not traits) that are malleable and open to change.
- Optimism / pessimism are attributional styles that can be taught and reinforced over time.
Additional insight on how our minds work
Excerpt from Optimism Article:
Using Attribution Theory, I can tell a lot about someone by the way they interpret the events that happen in their lives, particularly the explanatory style they use in analyzing setbacks versus successes.
The pessimist perceives failures as personal, permanent, and pervasive, and thus has difficulty moving beyond setbacks. They often get lost in a recurrent loop of negativity.
In contrast, optimists see setbacks as universal. to everyone, temporary in time, and limited to one or two areas of their lives.
Click Here to Watch Optimism Video Workshop
Hope you enjoy the workshop and have fun doing the interactive exercises!
Dr. D 💖☀️
Words of Encouragement.
The first thing that goes when we are faced with a stressor of any kind is the memory of all we have overcome in years gone by.
Let this be your daily, weekly, hourly reminder of how wildly capable you are.
Truly. Incredibly. Capable.
We might not be a genius at everything. But we are most definitely a genius at something.
And if you ever need more than this note to remind you of your strengths, let me know in the comments below.
And I will shine a light on the luminescence that surrounds you.
Fun Activity
What words resonate with you?
What jumps off the page?
These are your strengths.✨
Thriving Teams. Thriving Leaders.
LESSONS LEARNED
In the post below, I share lessons learned at a recent thriving student leadership teams workshop.
It was a true team effort! With the team-building and leadership exercises equally led by the student leaders and myself.
Please join in and explore the reflection questions, interactive activities, and workshop videos with the teams in your life.
Together Everyone Achieves More!
WHAT HELPS TEAMS FLOURISH & THRIVE?
1. Compassion and Empathy
“It takes both sides to build a bridge.”
Perspective taking exercise.
Discussion Questions:
1. Identify a problem you have faced as a student leader.
2. Determine what’s “below the surface” that could potentially be the source of the problem.
3. Explore the problem from the perspective of the student.
4. Describe the problem and potential solution using both the leader’s and the student’s perspectives.
5. Summarize the lessons and potential opportunities of the original problem. Eg. What did you learn about yourself? What did you learn about the student?“Together We Rise.”
2. Conscious Goal Setting
“Goals with Soul.”
Personal and Team goal setting exercise.
Discussion Questions:
1. What are your goals as student leader for the school year?
2. What are your goals as team member for the school year?
3. What are your greatest assets for the team?
4. What areas do you need assistance from the team?“Teamwork makes the dream work.”
3. Shared Vision
“Your life is your message to the world.”
“What’s Your North Star?” team building exercise.
Discussion Questions:
1. What’s Your Purpose?
2. What Lights Your Way?
3. What Bonds and Unites Your Team?“What’s Your Why?”
Everyday Leadership
- I encourage you to try our Thriving Teams Thriving Leaders Exercises in your own life.
- Whether it be your family team, your friendship team, your neighbourhood team, your church team, or your sports team.
- Teams are everywhere!
Assistance from UWSA Team
The videos in this post were filmed with the generous help of student leaders during my THRIVING TEAMS presentation at the University of Windsor Students’ Alliance (UWSA) Summer Board Retreat.
What an incredible group of leaders they are!
Helpful Resources
- TEDx Talk: Thriving Under Pressure
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=czXG8odb7pY - University of Windsor Students’ Alliance (UWSA) website
http://www.uwsa.ca
“Teamwork divides the task and multiplies the success.”
ABC Technique: Transforming Painful Experiences
Forces beyond your control can take away everything you possess except one thing: your freedom to choose how you will respond to the situation.
The Stories We Tell Ourselves
In this blog post and classroom video, I share strategies for transforming painful experiences. Especially those beyond your control.
Strategies include: Cognitive reframing (identifying and then disputing irrational or maladaptive thoughts) and the ABC technique (Antecedent, Belief, Consequence).
I also discuss my latest article in The Drive Magazine (link to article below) where I help a good friend transform the painful story in his life (house flood) into a more meaningful and empowering experience.
Read Here: https://www.thedrivemagazine.com/posts/the-stories-we-tell-ourselves
Tips for Transforming the Painful Story in Your Life
1. Talk to others who have overcome similar circumstances. Be open to their lessons.
2. Ask five people to identify five strengths. Refer to them during the low points in your day.
3. Reflect on times in your life when you have successfully overcome adversity.
4. Be proud of what you’ve been through and have faith in where you’re going.
Excerpt From The Stories We Tell Ourselves, The Drive Magazine
When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.
To Watch Video Click Here
Visualization Exercise: Look for the signs
Signs pointing us in the direction of our dreams are everywhere.
Everywhere!
But we have to look UP to see it.
OPEN our minds to BELIEVE it.
Daily Visualization Exercise
The next time you see a 40 km, 50 km, or even 100 km sign — take it as an opportunity to visualize where (and who) you want to be at that age.
Additionally, use each “sign” as instant reflection time for contemplating: 1) what you need to do more of and 2) what you need to let go of to get there.
We only get one life.
Let’s imagine the best one possible!
What signs have you noticed lately?
Optimism Bootcamp – Click Here
Peer Pressure and Alcohol: Stand Your Sacred Ground
The Social Side Effects of Change
Motivation to make a change is as much about you, as the people all around you. And unfortunately, not everyone agrees with our decision to grow, change, and evolve. In whatever form it may take.
“Being different isn’t a bad thing. It means you’re brave enough to be yourself“
For when we change, we unknowingly push friends and family outside their comfort zone too. And that’s ok. The important thing to understand is that not everyone is going to support our choice to change. Something I learned personally.
My story
This post was inspired by my own journey of quitting drinking in 2005, motivated by three reasons:
1. Starting a family with my husband.
2. Improving my health.
3. Being a role model for my students
Unexpected Side Effects
What I did not expect was the pressure to keep drinking that came along with my decision to give up alcohol over a decade ago.
The pressure to remain the same.
The pressure to behave like everyone else.
A resistance to change from others that I did not foresee.
My students’ stories
— Peer Pressure and Alcohol Use in College
Students over the age of 19 have a choice when it comes to drinking alcohol.
A decision to drink or not drink that is often overshadowed by peer pressure and the widespread culture of risky drinking on and off Canadian campuses.
Too often students drink to “fit in, reduce stress, numb anxiety” (their words) because they know of no other way.
Excerpt from today’s class:
Class Discussion and Solutions
Which is why it’s more important than ever to open up the conversation of what it’s like to be a young person amongst the culture of alcohol use and abuse today.
A hot topic that stimulates honest and open debate in my classroom each year. Including remedies to the pressures of college that extend far beyond alcohol.
To listen to our discussion click here.
Your story
1. What motivates you to make a health change?
2. What de-motivates you?
3. Have you experienced pressure from others to continue unhealthy habits? To not change?
4. How do you stay true to your personal choices?
Coping with Peer Pressure
Rather than debate or argue your case.
Be still and hold your space.
Take a deep breath, and trust your choices.
Trust that being yourself is enough.
You get one life. Make it yours.
Stand Your Sacred Ground.
Video of Blog Post — Click Here
