Failure as FEEDBACK | The Drive Magazine.

failure

There are two ways of looking at failure.

Failure as FEEDBACK.

Failure as PUNISHMENT.

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One energizes.

The other paralyzes.

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WHY FAILURE IS NECESSARY

I believe that failure is essential for success, at work and in our personal lives.

Failure lights our way to what we’re ultimately meant to do. Especially when we embrace it and consciously invite it into our lives. Pushing us past our comfort zones. Having the courage to take risks beyond our current circumstances.

Failure shows us what we’re good at, and equally what we are not skilled at. And how if we perceive failure as information (versus punishment) we will move on much more quickly to what we were born to do.

THE DRIVE MAGAZINE

I believe so strongly in the benefits of failure that I “pitched” failure as feedback to the editors of The Drive Magazine. And they said yes!

So here it is: A video overview of the February issue and links to the online edition of the magazine.

🔝  Psychology YouTube Channel 🔝

MAGAZINE edition
For the rest of the story, pick up a copy of The DRIVE Magazine.

ONLINE edition
My psychology article “Failure as FEEDBACK” is also available online: https://www.thedrivemagazine.com/posts/failure-as-feedback

Related: Lean into loneliness | The Drive Magazine

What’s my life purpose?

Who am I? Why was I born?

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So many people in this world are struggling with what to do with their lives.

An existential struggle that did not exist 100 years ago when jobs were more clearly defined.

Which is why it is essential to explore life purpose in many different ways.

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PURPOSE 🆚 JOB

We must not confuse life purpose with occupation.

My occupation = Psychology Professor.

My life purpose is to lift people up and help them feel better.

Something I can do on weekends, at work, with friends, in my community, and well into my retirement years.

Our occupation transpires 9-5. Our life purpose unfolds 24/7.

Life Purpose Discussions – Everywhere!

The topic of finding one’s life purpose was an active discussion on social media (see screen shot below) and in psychology class (link to video) this week.

Social Media: What’s my gift?

This is how I walked a fellow instagrammer through the process of (re)discovering their life purpose:
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HUMAN BEING 🆚 HUMAN DOING

Life purpose is a way of being.

A way of living and giving.

It is all encompassing.

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Who we are is our life purpose.

We are 1 in 7.5 billion.

What makes us different also makes us indispensable.

The world needs our unique kind of wonderful.

No more waiting. No more searching.

now

Our life purpose is now.

A daily mission. Big and small.

Supporting others and sharing our gift.

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We have purpose because we are alive.

Breath by breath. Step by step.

We are the dominos.

I hope you enjoy this video message on life purpose too.


Reflection Questions:

  1. When do you feel most alive and in flow?
  2. How is your life purpose different or the same as your occupation?
  3. If you could do any one thing for the rest of your life, and not worry about money, what would that be?
  4. In what ways did you feel ‘odd‘ or cast out when you were younger, only to realize later in life that your ‘differences‘ were your greatest strengths and sources of happiness?
  5. What unique, one-of-a-kind gift will you share with the world today?

We are all worthy – not because of what we do – but because of who we are. 🌷

Don’t give up. Great things take time.

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Don’t give up.

Great things take time.

Sometimes we have to go through the worst.

To get to the best.

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Fall down 7 times.

Stand up 8.

Today is your day.

Your time to rise up!

Trust and Believe in 2019 💥

This blog post and classroom video above are dedicated to all the students around the world struggling to stay motivated during this especially cold January. Cheering you on! Encouraging you to not give up. This post is also meant for you – My Fellow Students of Life.

What are you ready to let go of?

This post was inspired by a stressful situation that I couldn’t let go of, long beyond its solution. No matter how hard I tried. Day in day out. The worry would reappear. Then someone close to me suggested “I shed the stress”. And a lightbulb went off. Each time the repetitive thought appeared, I imagined a tree shedding its leaves. A golden leaf for every anxious thought. This visualization process made all the difference. And so did writing about it.  📝🍂

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If you had a magic wand, what would you ask to disappear in your life right now?

What would you say good-bye to?

Once and for all.

It could be an emotion. Or a thought.

A relationship. Or a job.

A place or a thing.

Stress management is a shedding process ℘ Not an acquisition project

It’s time to let go of what drains you.

Let go of what holds you back.

Let go of what keeps you down.

It could be a mindset. Or a memory.

A situation. Or an attitude.

Write it down. Shout it out.

Stress management is a shedding process  Not a holding pattern

It’s time to let go of what weighs you down.

Release it to the universe.

Declare your freedom.

Vow to move on and beyond.

Once and for all.

Stress management is a shedding process ℘ Not an endurance test

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Shed the stress. Let. It. Fall. 🍂

Authenticity empowers you.

“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.” Mae West

◊  In this video clip from my “Pitch with Passion” seminar with student and community entrepreneurs, I discuss the importance of being authentic and true to oneself. 

Not everyone is going to like who you are.

Not everyone is going to like the message you are sharing.

◊ And that’s ok ◊

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What matters most is that you stay true to you.

And the work you believe in.

For authenticity ultimately empowers success.

In business and in life!

Visit my YouTube Channel

Set a time limit on negativity.

Time is in such short supply. The sooner we appreciate its value, the better life becomes.

When I was a kid my mom set the egg timer for almost everything we did; whether it was how long we spent doing our homework, weeding the garden, watching television, or complaining about life’s challenges.

It helped us to understand that nothing lasts forever – good or bad.

This was especially important when we felt helpless over things we did not have control over, including chores we  did not want to do.

Setting time limits also taught us to respect how our words and actions impact ourselves and others.

Full disclosure: My mom is a psychologist too.

Your time. Your life.

To this day I set a timer on the stove.

A simple, yet effective way to motivate myself through tedious tasks and become more mindful of time itself.

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The timer principle can also be applied to how often we are negative vs. positive throughout the course of a day.

Negativity is the easy (automatic) route. So we need to be conscious of where our mind flows.

Venting feels good in the moment, but when it goes on too long, the costs outweigh the benefits.

Joy needs room to breathe.

Too often we complain about stressors for hours beyond the momentary challenge has passed. Leaving little time in the day for appreciation, wonder, and gratitude.

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Then one day we wake up and realize that life is too short to be all negative, all the time. Even (especially) when life gets tough.

Balance is key.

Negativity is to be expected. It’s part of the human experience.

The question is – how long will you stay there.

Share your challenges. Share your obstacles. Share your difficulties.

But also leave room for what’s good in your life.

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Joy needs room to breathe.

And so do you. ♥

▪️Reblogged from October 2016▪️

The Drive Magazine Interview.

Happy Monday Everyone!

I am excited to share my interview with The Drive Magazine on positive psychology and stress resilience. Inspired by my TEDx Talk: Thriving Under Pressure.

The 3 C’s of Positive Psychology

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My favourite part of this photo is the story behind it.

When the magazine was arranging the photo shoot, they asked where my favourite place to recharge was in Windsor (Ontario, Canada). I shared that it was a top of Blue Heron Hill overlooking Lake Heron and Lake St. Clair. So you can just imagine the photographer hiking his equipment up the hill, with me tagging along in my wedge high sandals!

But the reward was worth it..
All you can see is blue for days. My favourite colour and place. 💙🍃

I hope this interview encourages you to keep shooting for the stars and believing in your dreams.

Ultimately reminding you that the power within you will always be greater than the challenges around you.

Click on The Drive Magazine to read the full interview.

5 Steps to Thriving.

Note: This is my very first Vlog post. I supplemented an earlier post with a new 3 minute video presentation. I have lots to learn for sure. But it sure feels good to jump outside my comfort zone!

Thriving Steps based on Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs

Step 1

 Physiological Needs

– Energy of Thriving

  • A good night’s sleep.
  • Healthy food.
  • Clean air to breathe.

Step 2

 Safety Needs 

– Foundation of Thriving

  • Freedom.
  • Survival Skills.
  • Safe place to live.

Step 3

Love and Belonging Needs

– Nourishment of Thriving 

  • Supportive relationships.
  • Loving family and friends.
  • Encouraging coworkers.

Step 4

Self Esteem Needs

– Enrichment of Thriving

  • Education and learning.
  • Goals and ambition.
  • Stretching outside comfort zone.

Step 5

Self Actualization Needs

– Ultimate Thriving 

  • Purpose and Vision.
  • Achievement of Life Mission.
  • Self Actualization of Dreams.

How will you thrive today?

How will you move the world today?

What are you most excited about in your life right now?

What brings a smile to your face and makes your heart skip a beat?

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Each time you share your zest for life  — you move the world !

Related Post: Enthusiasm is contagious.

Reigniting Motivation.

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I wrote this on the blackboard for my nursing students today.

This is their final week of classes. Which means one final opportunity for me to encourage their success.

This is my favourite part of teaching psychology. Every time I face a challenge, I imagine how I can translate it into a motivating lesson for my students.

Reminding students why they started nursing school is energizing. Staying inspired during final exams is galvanizing. Not giving up is the ultimate test.

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Thoughts ⇔ Motivation ⇔ Action

Transforming thought patterns is critical for student motivation and success. As what happens behind our eyes is as powerful as what happens in front of our eyes.

Reframe your thoughts. Reignite your motivation.

Instead of thinking of nursing school as an obstacle to overcome. Reframe it as superhero training. Heros save lives. And so do nurses. Every single day.

Will it be easy? No   ↑   Will it be worth it? Yes!

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Related Post: Staying Motivated During a Challenge.

How do you reframe to reignite motivation?