Challenges appear small in comparison to the vastness of the sky.
Solutions seem plausible. Answers come more easily.
In the presence of stars, we embrace the profound and surrender it all.
Look, up at the sky. There is a light, a beauty up there, that no shadow can touch.
J. R. R. Tolkien
Related Post: Always Looking Up
I was motivated to write this post and film an accompanying video after witnessing so many students overwrought by thoughts of inadequacy about how they looked.
In reality, there was no doubt that they were healthy and whole, but in their minds, they believed the opposite.
A phenomenon heightened by imaginary audience and social anxiety, which reaches its peak in adolescence.
Imaginary Audience Video: Click Here
Body Image Video: Click Here
These articles provide insight into why body dissatisfaction continues to be an issue, despite countless campaigns to turn the tide.
Article 1
The Image in the Mirror and the Number on the Scale
Link https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3610322
Article 2
The Effects of Social Media on Body Image and Mental Health
Link http://lifesciencesjournal.org/2020/02/the-effects-of-social-media-on-body-image-and-mental-health
Article 3
Body Weight and Self-Perception are Associated with Depression
Link Results from the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey (NHANES)
The First Step Towards Change is Awareness
The 15 questions below challenge cognitive distortions and perceptions using reality itself.
This inquiry is not limited to body image and weight and thus can be applied to areas of life where you find yourself overthinking and ruminating.
Source: Challenging Cognitive Distortions
Related: The Stories We Tell Ourselves
In addition to spending time in self reflection and reality testing, it is important to open up the conversation to the community at large.
In doing so we move into collective problem-solving, empowering solutions, and public health education.
“In this episode, Stephani and Dr. Dinardo speak about what positive psychology is, turning your perceived flaws into strengths by moving from self-criticism to self-compassion, posttraumatic growth and how adversity can be beneficial to us, boundaries around social media use, the magic of prevention work and maintaining hope”. Bulimia Anorexia Nervosa Association (BANA)
Listen to Interview: Click Here Watch Video of Post: Click Here
How are you coping with our universal global event?
After socially distancing and working full-time from home as a psychology professor (now online), I had never felt more appreciative and grateful for all the simple joys in my life.
In this video created for Windsor Updates I share how our family is thriving instead of merely surviving the COVID-19 crisis.
Including counting our blessings like never before.
In the next video I share pandemic resilience techniques with our local Windsor Essex community.
An interactive virtual experience hosted by F45 fitness studio owner Samantha Piercell:
What has COVID-19 awakened in you?
Compare Your Answer to One Year Ago
Video of Post: Click Here
The following video is an excerpt from my resilience keynote speech at the Healthy Workplace Awards Ceremony.
Psychology Reflection Questions
How do you see resilience?
What helps you bounce back and move forward?
For me, it’s the belief that setbacks are temporary.
And the internal power it creates lasts forever.
Link to full resilience video — https://youtu.be/8VvwITnvrhs
This list was initially created for students embarking on a new career during covid-19. It also includes EQ techniques helpful for everyone.
Watch 3 min Video of Post: Click Here
F45 "Live" Event: Community Resilience with Dr. Andrea Dinardo
Community members asked stress, wellness, and psychology questions in real time.
Throughout the resilience seminar, I also shared daily habits and thought patterns keeping me healthy during the pandemic.
Optimism, hope, and humour are key factors in health, happiness, and resilience.
Optimism Bootcamp The Drive Magazine
Since then, I have been interviewed virtually by:
We discussed situational and pandemic anxiety, health and positive psychology, time and energy management, social media boundaries, resilience, and thriving under pressure.
In the past, online interactions were “an extra” to everyday conversation.
Now “the virtual life” is a necessity for both our personal and professional lives.
An important and crucial way to stay connected to both our dreams and each other.
PSYCHOLOGY TEACHING ONLINE - BEHIND THE SCENES: 1. What It's Like to Be a Professor During Global Pandemic 2. "Live" Online Psychology Class
“Adapt or Die” may sound harsh.
But adaptation is truly what’s being asked of us in every area of our lives right now.
So I figure I might as well jump right in!
Because I would rather ride the wave, than have the wave ride me. 🌊
VIRTUAL KEYNOTE: Healthy Workplace Awards
The 5 Why’s is a simple and effective technique for understanding the source of our fears and cognitive distortions (irrational beliefs) one why at a time.
An analytic (below the surface) strategy originating in the psychoanalytic theories of Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung.
Freud’s Iceberg Analogy : Click Here
With the ultimate intention of enhancing inner peace and understanding.
By differentiating what’s real from what’s not.
To Learn More
Watch my in-depth interview on situational anxiety with Dr. Katherin Garland: https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=N7ttX6h_D8o
Watch Video Of Post: Click Here
With time, I have come to realize that failure has always been my greatest teacher. Each failure pointed me in a better direction and helped me to develop strength and authenticity, ultimately unveiling who I was and what I was destined to become
F. A. I. L. = First Attempt In Learning
• The failing grade I received on my first exam in graduate school taught me how to ask for support when I needed it most, no matter how shameful I felt or embarrassed I was.
• The end of a long-term relationship taught me how to value my time alone and make tough decisions for myself, no matter how weak I felt or lonesome I was.
• The layoff from a job I loved taught me how to let go, look forward, and trust in something so much bigger than myself, no matter how scared I was or irrelevant I felt.
“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”
Is it possible to see failure in a positive light?
Under the right conditions, failure strengthens us, adds to our self-knowledge, and enhances the quality of our lives
• If it weren’t for failure, I would not have met my husband John.
• If it weren’t for failure, I would not be a psychology professor.
• If it weren’t for failure, I would not have written three textbooks.
• If it weren’t for failure, I would not be the person I am today.
“Failure is the opportunity to begin again.”
Read My Article in The Drive Magazine: https://thedrivemagazine.com/posts/failure-as-feedback
Watch Video of Post: Click Here
Especially at the start of a brand new day.
A topic I talk about with love and laughter in this video workshop:
Step One: Awareness
Begin by WAKING UP to your inner dialogue tomorrow morning.
Is it loving? Is it kind?
Step Two: Mirror Affirmations
Write an encouraging quote for yourself on your bathroom mirror.
Pick any one of the quotes you’ve shared with the world on social media this past year and post it for yourself on your bathroom mirror.
It only takes one thought, one word, one smile, one song, to change a life.
You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.
Thoughts. Emotions. Actions. People.
Some drain. Others invigorate.
Awareness is the first step to enhancing vitality.
The goal is to identify the source of energy leaks and peaks.
My recent interview on FM 105.9 The Region was designed to help people become more conscious of what depletes their energy and what lifts them up.
A health psychology practice that benefits mood, motivation, and productivity.
Because when we feel energized, we can do twice as much in half the time.
Rather than focusing on time, which is finite, I suggested to radio host Candace Sampson that we turn our attention to energy management, which in turn expands the amount of time we have.
What She Said Talk on FM 105.9 The Region
| Tip #1: Debits and Credits (Energy Audit) Daily Tracking System of Who and What Depletes You |
| Tip #2: Put a Time Limit on Negativity (Stove Timer) Conscious awareness of how much time with friends and family is spent on complaining (draining) versus solutions (energizing). |
| Tip #3: Energy is Everywhere (Combat Boots Anchoring Exercise) Energetic grounding rituals before interacting online. |
| *All 3 tips described in detail in both a) the August 20 energy video above and b) the extended September 1 podcast interview below. |
Video of Blog Post: Click Here
Freedom doesn’t come from holding on.
Freedom comes from letting go.
Again and again and again.
Too often we are hard on ourselves for having to release the same thought, emotion, person, or situation over and over again.
When in fact this is how life goes.
Letting go and surrendering are an ongoing process. And as necessary for our mental health as eating is for our physical health.
We must eat three times a day. And sometimes we have to surrender (thirty) three times a day.
And that’s ok. That’s how life flows..
F R E E D O M
If you only had ONE YEAR to live:
What would you STOP doing?
THE CHOICE IS YOURS
Video of Blog Post: Click Here
Mental Health Matters Interview
Situational Anxiety
This week, I speak with one of my dearest blogging friends, Dr. D!
We discuss all things anxiety. She explains the difference between anxiety disorder and situational anxiety.
Dr. Dinardo provides 3 strategies to help us cope with situational anxiety, especially because it may be heightened during the pandemic and times of racial unrest.
1. Video Format of Interview
Watch on YouTube.
2. Podcast Format of Interview
Available on SoundCloud and Apple Podcasts.
Reflection Questions
Watch Anxiety Video: Click Here
The most common question people ask when they discover I’m a retired psychologist is – “Is This Normal?“
This question is a significant motivator for creating this psychology blog in the first place.
Because too often people suffer because of lack of understanding versus a diagnosable medical condition.
differential diagnosis · the process of differentiating between two or more conditions which share similar signs or symptoms.
Two people present with similar symptoms (e.g., rapid heart beat, excessive worrying, difficulty concentrating) with vastly different causes.
One person’s symptoms is caused by lack of sleep, excessive caffeine consumption, and a recent breakup.
While the other person’s symptoms is caused by a mental illness, as diagnosed by a registered psychologist, using the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5).
One improves with time and lifestyle changes, while the other requires more intensive psychological intervention.
This is why it’s my life mission to share psychology everywhere, all the time.
In the classroom. During podcasts. On YouTube. Radio. Television. Psychology articles, textbooks and blog posts. On the TEDx stage. Instagram . In between sets at F45 workouts.. and at the local coffee shop.
Psychology is my favourite subject after all.
To make DAILY mental health education accessible, sustainable, and easily APPLICABLE.
To eradicate misconceptions about normal versus abnormal functioning.
To reduce stigma about mental illness.
Therapy versus Talking to Friends: What's the difference?
Especially when it comes to transitory states, emotions, and situations.
Sadness versus clinical depression.
Neatness versus obsessive compulsive disorder.
The topic of this week’s psychology video:
Is This Normal? Temporary Emotions versus Mental Illness
For example, distressing emotions often improve with rest, perspective, and time.
While mental illness requires more ongoing medical support and therapy to see improved functioning.
My hope is that mental health education becomes paramount in both the classroom and the doctor’s office.
An ongoing conversation about what’s healthy versus what’s not.
So that people don’t automatically assume they’re mentally ill simply because they’re having a bad day.
More Resources Coming Soon!
Host Dr. Kathy Garland
SITUATIONAL ANXIETY with Dr. Dinardo
Airing July 31, 2020!
Stay Tuned for Dr. Garland’s Video & Podcast!
For Example: Anger
That said, it’s not as simple as becoming “more calm” or “less explosive”.
The Kübler-Ross Model provides insight:
The goal is to discover if angry thoughts, actions, or emotions are serving a purpose.
Is anger helping or hurting?
And if this is the case, the goal of coaching is to help clients replace confrontations (for example) with more effective communication patterns.
PSYCHOLOGY HOMEWORK
Anger → Awareness
First: Set aside time to journal thoughts and emotions about “hot topics”. This allows for a cooling off period and a chance for self reflection and integration.
Second: Plan a mutually beneficial time to discuss anger triggers and solutions with friends and family.
This 2-step communication technique results in safe, open, and engaging conversations that move both relationships and actions forward. Win Win!
Strength during the lowest of lows?
Peace in difficulty?
Happiness during COVID-19?
In the video below, I share some personal examples from my own upbringing on how my parents found strength and contentment during even the darkest of times.
I’d love to hear your ideas, theories, and personal stories.
Video of Post → Click Here
WHY ARE WE SO HARD ON OURSELVES?
Great question!
One that I’m asked often. And one that I often ask myself.
The answer is multifaceted and includes several factors including how we were parented (when internalized superego and conscience first develops) and eventually how we parent ourselves.
For example:
When something goes wrong, how do you respond?
1. Self Criticism versus Self Compassion
2. Self Control versus Self Love and Understanding
How do I make the shift from self criticism to self compassion?
1. Pay attention to where your self judgements originated.
Is this your personal measure of worthiness or society’s expectation of success?
2. Investigate how truly arbitrary the standards you set for yourself are.
For example, who said you had to weigh 125 lbs, have a million dollars in the bank, and be married by 30?
3. Don’t Believe Everything You Think!
Everyone experiences time differently.
Because time truly is relative.
For example:
For example:
Taken one step further, time defines who we are, and ultimately who we become.
How we live our days is how we live our lives.
Moments → Hours → Days → Months → Lifetimes
Which is why the more conscious and aware we become about how we spend and prioritize our time, the more meaningful and satisfying our lives will become.
Concrete Examples of Time Usage
Identify 5 ways you spend 100 units (dollars) of time each day. (As illustrated in the video)
Compare and contrast your “money time sheet” with family and friends.
Are you more influenced by external measures of time?
Has your use of time changed since COVID?
Has your perception of time changed with age?
The trouble is, you think you have time.Jack Kornfield
Watch Video of Blog Post → Click Here
Change your life.
Acceptance and peace go hand in hand.
When we accept the things we cannot change, we save our energy for the things we can.
Consciously accept the good and the bad that exists in your life.
The rain and the sunlight.
Quite the opposite.
Strengths that were fostered in the eye of the storm. ☔️
Courage. Creativity. Wisdom. Perseverance. Faith.
And it’s that good feeling that motivates you to strive for more of what’s right for you. Instead of fighting against what’s wrong for you.
Begin by accepting what is.
Moment by precious moment.
Your wellness depends on it.
The 3 to 1 positivity to negativity ratio is one way of applying this post in your everyday life.
Specifically, each time you criticize an area of your life (or something about yourself personally), write down three positive aspects about the very thing you condemned. Hence, the 3 to 1 positivity ratio.
For example, each time you get down on yourself for not working during the COVID-19 pandemic, write down three benefits of sheltering in place. (E.g., more time for fitness, the space to try out new hobbies, meaningful conversations with family members). This daily practice helps to dampen the adverse impact of negativity bias, a type of cognitive distortion, common to all of us.
Likewise, stop comparing your lowlights to other people’s highlights. You never know what’s happening behind the scenes in another person’s life. Good or bad. FOMO is “a story” fabricated in the mind based on snippets of observable behaviour (video below).
You Can’t Add More to Your Life Without First Letting Go
Three Ways ~ 2020 graduates ~ can bridge the gap between what was ~ and what will be.
All three resilience strategies described in full detail in the 8 minute video below:
Growth happens in the s p a c e in between.
This video presentation was created in partnership with the Student Representative Council (SRC) at St. Clair College in Windsor Ontario Canada.
For example:
Watch this short video on my own experience with peer pressure, alcohol, and behaviour change and answer the questions below.
EmpoweringI also encourage use of this video and reflection questions as an opportunity to talk openly with friends and family about the powerful impact of social influence on substance use. Open conversations empower youth to think for themselves and in turn, reduces their susceptibility to coercion.
Watch Psychology Video → Click Here
Today I would like to shine a light on a local entrepreneur named Alex Binaei, the creative mind behind Windsor Updates and the video highlighted in this post.
Alex’s video for Windsor Updates is one of the best examples of how crisis and adversity create innovation and ingenuity. In both our community and in ourselves.
This video is a compilation of news, announcements, and local community members discussing the Covid-19 (Coronavirus) pandemic taking place in Windsor-Essex Ontario and around the world. Including offers of support, advice, and information.
Research on Social Support & Psychological Health
Being surrounded by people who are supportive helps individuals see themselves as capable of handling stress and adversity. Research has also shown that having strong social support in times of crisis can help reduce the consequences of trauma-induced disorders including PTSD.
Original Source: Click Here
Thank you Windsor Updates for including me in this vital project. Your ingenuity and generosity gives me strength and hope! ♥
How are you coping with our universal global event?
After socially distancing and working full-time from home as a psychology professor (now online), I had never felt more appreciative and grateful for all the simple joys in my life.
In this video created for Windsor Updates I share how our family is thriving instead of merely surviving the COVID-19 crisis.
Including counting our blessings like never before.
In the next video I share pandemic resilience techniques with our local Windsor Essex community.
An interactive virtual experience hosted by F45 fitness studio owner Samantha Piercell:
Video of Post: Click Here
Follow Your Breath Become aware of each inhalation and exhalation. Focus on the sensations you feel as air passes through your nose and throat. When you feel your thoughts drift, gently redirect your attention back to your breath.
Stand Up Straight Posture is especially important for breathing. Being upright enhances the rhythmic movement between the diaphragm and ribs. Hold yourself straight. Shoulders back. Feel the power of your breath.
Think Reassuring Thoughts While Breathing With each breath, think soothing thoughts (“I am inhaling calm”). With each exhalation, imagine that you are expelling your fears and worries (“I am exhaling worry”).
Abdominal Breathing Breathe through your stomach. Start by inflating your belly by inhaling, as if to fill it with air, then swell your chest; as you exhale, first “empty” your stomach, then your chest.
Balanced Breathing At the end of each inhalation, pause briefly while slowly counting “1, 2, 3”. Hold the air in. Then slowly exhale counting “1, 2, 3”.
Source: Scientific American
What brings you peace during uncertainty?
What gives you strength?
Breathing Video → Click Here
