Category: Mindfulness

Psychology Insights: Self Criticism to Self Compassion

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn empowerment, Happiness, health, Hope, Inspiration, Mindfulness, Peace, Personal Growth, psychology, Video46 Comments

WHY ARE WE SO HARD ON OURSELVES?

Great question!

One that I’m asked often. And one that I often ask myself.

PSYCHOLOGY INSIGHTS

What causes this behaviour?

The answer is multifaceted and includes several factors including how we were parented (when internalized superego and conscience first develops) and eventually how we parent ourselves.

For example:

When something goes wrong, how do you respond?

1. Self Criticism versus Self Compassion

2. Self Control versus Self Love and Understanding 

PSYCHOLOGY SOLUTIONS

22ABEFD7-AD25-4963-83D4-2131DB79E5C4

How do I make the shift from self criticism to self compassion?

1. Pay attention to where your self judgements originated.

Is this your personal measure of worthiness or society’s expectation of success?

2. Investigate how truly arbitrary the standards you set for yourself are.

For example, who said you had to weigh 125 lbs, have a million dollars in the bank, and be married by 30?

3. Don’t Believe Everything You Think!

Watch this short video for additional insights into the developmental origins of toxic self criticism, unrealistic standards, and the SUPERego.

“Be kinder to yourself. And let your kindness flood the world.” 

VISIT PSYCHOLOGY YOUTUBE CHANNEL: 
https://m.youtube.com/c/DrAndreaDinardo

FOMO ANXIETY Simple Tips for Feeling Better

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Emotional Awareness, Gratitude, Happiness, Mental Health, Mindfulness, Peace, Reflection Question, Video23 Comments

This post is for anyone experiencing FOMO. Particularly on a long weekend holiday!

Psychology Insight:

Holidays heighten social anxiety of every kind.

FOMO especially.

Consider these questions as you explore what’s going on below the surface.

1. Do you remember the first time you experienced FOMO?

2. How did you cope with the anxiety of missing out?

3. What if anything would you be willing to give up in your life in exchange for the fantasy of someone else’s life or experience?

4. What about your life do you cherish above all else?

Please share in the comments below, including your own strategies for handling FOMO. I’d love to know!

Savour this moment.

3E95F229-B2C1-4E78-9137-D02C69B56015

Free Yourself 🦋

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn courage, Emotional Freedom, empowerment, Happiness, health, Inspiration, Mental Health, Mindfulness, Peace, Reflection Question, Stress Relief and Release, Video55 Comments

3968B6C2-E3D6-4CA0-A86C-93804DD85BDF

EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE

1. What would you stop doing if you only had one year to live?

2. What would you start doing if you only had one year to live?

3. What do you need to let go of to feel a sense of happiness, well-being, and peace? 

4. What and who do you no longer want to be obligated to?

5. What joy do you wish you had more time for?

27CAB6D7-2D72-410B-BC1A-85F46E779FC0

CONTEMPLATION TIME

Take a long deep breath and meditate on your answers. You’ll be surprised at what your soul has to say.

YOU GET ONE LIFE.

Make it yours. 

Dear Readers:

This video is equally a note to you + me reminding us to live with discernment and wisdom. For not everyone in our life appreciates the limits of our time and energy. And that’s ok. For we are the magic wand. We have the power to make choices. We have the ability to overcome social conditioning. We have the authority to change what and who we want in our lives. What and who we give our energy to unnecessarily, repeatedly, unconsciously.

WE HAVE THE POWER TO CHOOSE.

This ^ is freedom.

Body Image: Don’t Believe Everything You Think 💭

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn cognitive psychology, Emotional Awareness, empowerment, Health Psychology, Mental Health, Mindfulness, resources, Video13 Comments

Perception versus Reality

I was motivated to write this post and film the accompanying video after witnessing so many students overwrought by feelings of inadequacy regarding their body image and self worth.

DD391A1A-3679-4619-A4C8-8F4ECD0C905C

There was no doubt that in reality they were healthy and whole, but in their minds, they believed the opposite.

 The Antidote

The following is a set of questions that challenge irrational perceptions and cognitive distortions using reality itself.

The inquiry is not limited to body image and weight and thus can be applied in any areas where you find yourself caught in a repetitive thought loop.

FE8A3DBB-DA11-4100-B36D-8A62F9E4100B

Reality Testing Homework:

  1. How do I know if this thought is accurate?
  2. What evidence do I have to support this thought or belief?
  3. How can I test my assumptions/beliefs to find out if they’re accurate?
  4. Do I have a trusted friend whom I can check out these thoughts with?
  5. Is this thought helpful?
  6. Are there other ways that I can think about this or myself?
  7. Is it really in my control?
  8. Am I overgeneralizing?
  9. Am I making assumptions?
  10. What would I say to a friend in this situation?
  11. Can I look for “shades of gray”?
  12. Am I assuming the worst?
  13. Am I holding myself to an unreasonable standard?
  14. Are there exceptions to these absolutes (always, never)?
  15. Am I making this personal when it isn’t?

Source: Challenging Cognitive Distortions

7F49B21B-2F22-4628-87A1-B5150F4157BA

Related Research & Articles

1. Past visual experiences weigh in on body size estimation. https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-017-18418-3#Sec2

2. The image in the mirror and the number on the scale: Weight, Weight Perceptions, and Adolescent Depressive Symptoms. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3610322/

3. Perception versus reality of body weight: Which matters most. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0165032713002905

4. How social media contributes to body dysmorphia. https://www.thelexingtonline.com/blog/2018/5/7/how-social-media-contributes-to-body-dysmorphic-behaviors

DB696A1B-0261-4479-9EEF-3D70AB412AC6

REFLECTION QUESTIONS

What are your perceptual filters?

Rose coloured? Perfectionist? Overachiever?

How often do you TEST reality?

Do you believe everything you think?

Click Here to Watch Video

DrAndreaDinardo.com

Finding the light.

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Affirmation, Mindfulness, Peace, positivity, Relaxation, Self-Care, Zen25 Comments

How do you start the day?

Do your morning routines lighten you up?

Or bring you down?

CF870C6D-B4F3-4064-99CF-769BDB5EA92C

Early morning rituals spark the divine in me.

No matter the day. No matter the moment.

Angel cards, hot coffee, and mindfulness take me there.

Fueling my creativity. Illuminating my path. Shifting me higher.

Today’s Angel Reading — Click Here

Early morning rituals call forth the peace in me.

No matter the day. No matter the moment.

Angel cards, hot coffee, and mindfulness take me there.

In this sacred space I breathe in deep, let go, and freely release…

75A003A4-F6EE-4298-B405-9849D7CEE4D8

Early morning rituals affirm the courage in me.

For I have finally found the light in me.

Ready to share ☀️ with all that I meet.

136904E0-6DD1-4406-98A4-64016AA577A5

Reflection Questions

How do you rediscover the light inside? What morning rituals shift you to a higher place?

27FDF022-3AA6-4CFE-9696-69FCCCF2A2F2

Happiness: What deters it? What contributes to it?

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Happiness, Mindfulness, Personal Growth, Psychology Class, Purpose and Meaning, Reflection Question, Video26 Comments

The Happiness Class

4115936F-330B-4596-95BF-54D9A7676FEF

One of my favourite things to do as a professor is to stay after class and talk to students. They look at the world in a very unique way. Motivating me to think about psychology at a whole different level.

  • Especially when it comes to FOMO and happiness:

FOMO is an acronym for fear of missing out, which is a feeling of anxiety that manifests itself in various ways, from a brief pang of envy to more intense feelings of self-doubt or inadequacy. Source: Macmillan Dictionary

Student Insights

In the video below I share the insightful questions my psychology students asked about social comparison and happiness today. Each question underscoring the famous quote:  

“Comparison is the thief of joy.”

Happiness, FOMO, and Social Comparison

FOMO and “measuring happiness” against each other’s’s lowlight reel (difficult times) and highlight reel (celebratory times) was also an active discussion on social media

7C88F151-CA70-4C6E-8C09-C80DFAA82EEC

I would love your insights too!

How would you answer the questions posed by my students:

  1. What are 2 deterrents to happiness?
  2. What are 2 contributors to happiness?
  3. How is your happiness influenced by other people’s highlights and lowlights?
    • Social comparison and happiness was the crux of today’s class discussion and accompanying video.
  4. What simple changes can you make today to enhance your happiness?

4022C27C-5A1B-471E-8D83-4484DC24A7C4

Optimism Bootcamp - Click Here

One Minute to Mindfulness: Look Up

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Mindfulness, nature, Peace, positivity, Purpose and Meaning, Relaxation, Video27 Comments

F5DC5F59-184C-4A7B-8F04-E4E7E0EA0A19

From Restless to Restful

I look up every chance I get. First thing in the morning. On my run. On my way to work. In between classes. Out for a bike ride. From the skylight in my office. On the front porch before I go to sleep.

Connected to Something Bigger

The sky connects us to something much bigger. Challenges seem small in comparison to the vastness of the sky. Solutions seem plausible. Answers come more easily.

One Minute to Mindfulness — Click Here

Peace in Every Glance

The stars heighten our awareness, expand our field of possibilities, and relax our mind. In their presence, we embrace the profound and surrender the pettiness.

When we look up, we become fully present. In the moment. Completely mindful. Nowhere else to be but one with the sky.

FDCFA12B-EB28-42F3-AB9C-FB4511EA2118

Reflection Questions

What are your mindfulness tips?

How do you transcend your restless thoughts?

How often do you look up?

Are you a star gazer or a sun worshipper?

Do you see pictures in the clouds?

8160C543-0F08-4C65-AE53-BB08E6CA494A

Video of Blog Post — Click Here

Your emotions have a message for you.

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Emotional Awareness, Mental Health, Mindfulness, Peace, Personal Growth, Self Reflection, Video

Create space for feelings to flow.

Quotefancy-55413-3840x2160

Emotions are neither good or bad.

Only labeling makes it so.

Don’t run from challenging emotions.

Instead, lean in and ask:

“What are you trying to tell me?”

Witness. Observe. Learn.

The best part is how small fear appears close up!

We must go in — to get through.

Helpful Article with Strategies

Click Here:  Lean into lonelinessDriveLoneliness

What brings you joy?

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Gratitude, Happiness, Hope, Love, Mantra, Mindfulness, Peace

4FBC8C12-7774-4E80-B079-D167A033ED8C.jpeg

What brings you joy on a Saturday morning, Friday night, or Tuesday afternoon?

From my experience, it’s never the time, the day, or the month that brings good vibes. It’s how we feel on the inside. So why wait another minute for happy hour. Create the life you want wherever you are. 😊😊

Related Post: Happiness in Present Time

My husband and I met 17 years ago today on June 1, 2002. And I couldn’t imagine a better way to celebrate our happy hours together than with this little blog post. May your month of June overflow with love and joy too!

Laughter is an instant vacation.

On By Dr. Andrea DinardoIn Flow, Happiness, health, Hope, Inspiration, Mindfulness, positivity, Stress Management

What’s your favourite stress reliever?

Laughter is mine.

We live in a world weighed down by disaster, debt, and divorce. So it’s no surprise that we’ve been conditioned to believe that tragedies require tragic mindsets.

That serious issues demand serious attitudes. That hardships necessitate hardened spirits.

What consumes your mind consumes your life.

laughterstress

Change your view.

Thankfully we also live in a world overflowing with abundance, joy, and love. Same world. But we can’t see the good when we’re overwhelmed by the bad.

From overwhelmed to OVERFLOWING.

Making the shift from stress to strength can happen in a number of ways.

Laughter = instant stress relief. Taking a long deep breath runs a close second.

7648B27E-63E4-4556-B334-FACF802B1C7B

Be kind to your mind.

Laughter breaks the panic spell. The not enough mindset. The woe is me attitude. The negativity downturn.

Laughter connects people in present time. Friends and strangers!  Think of the last time you laughed out loud with a cashier in the grocery line. (For me, it was last night ;.)

Laughter is an instant vacation to a better place – without the travel bills!

D7E51C39-CBC0-490F-90D1-A3C1F5F41810

Today’s challenge / opportunity:

Today’s challenge is to lighten up. To breathe deeply into what stresses you.

 To leave room for grace. To respond with a light heart and an open mind. To dance a little dance. To laugh with friends. To nourish your soul.

Ultimately to remember who you were – before life weighed you down. 

For it’s in our joy that we find our voice. It’s in our abundance that we embrace our authenticity.

It’s in our laughter that we save the day.